revenge

Clips from Ridley Scott's first two films. He seems to have mellowed in older age.

http://youtu.be/YhwIrONyEzg

http://youtu.be/1Z5sX4qC5HE

In the UK both Russell Brand and Charles Saatchi have admitted their narcissism after public rages.

A nice easy read is "They F*** You Up" by Oliver James. The title is from the poem by effeminate FN Philip Larkin.

Hey madjoe,

The quote comes from the Roman Catholic tradition. It's St. Augustine's most famous quote. However it refers to the emotion of resentment. Resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies. You could easily apply it to revenge. The following article explains it pretty well.

"A boss or a manager ticks you off, an employee makes you angry, or a friend or family member upsets you. Holding a grudge and harboring resentment are about as beneficial as…well…nothing. As Malachy McCourt once said, “Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Grudges do no good whatsoever and they benefit no one, neither in our business lives nor our personal lives.

Sadly, many grudges are simply misunderstandings that people didn’t talk through. They occur when one person assumes something about the other person and labels it as fact in their own mind. Then they hold onto it, and pass judgment based on it, and the next thing you know they find themselves wallowing in a pool of resentment. The longer they choose to stay in the pool, the more bitter and withered they become.

“What grudge-holders don’t always understand is how much strain on themselves holding a grudge causes. It takes a significant amount of mental and emotional energy to keep the steady stream of hostility and aggression (or passive-aggression) that supports a grudge. This kind of cognitive-emotional process is commonly seen in people who aren’t able to ‘let go’ of, or resolve issues that present in relationships.…What ends up generally happening is, the grudge-holders focus so intensely on negativity that it disables their ability to let go of the situation. This causes a vicious cycle: negativity causes more anger, and more anger causes more negativity. -Nathan Feiles, LCSW

Jumping to conclusions and holding a grudge is literally like locking yourself in prison for a crime you think someone else committed, and doing it before you’ve even investigated to know if a crime actually took place or not – which would be crazy to do, right?! So first and foremost we should stop ourselves from jumping to conclusions and we shouldn’t let misunderstandings become false facts we pass judgement on. Instead we should commit to simply asking questions and then seek to understand one another’s views in the hope of eliminating grudges before they begin.

Will there be times when we ask the questions and gather the facts and find that we do have reason to be angry or upset with someone? Of course there will be. So that’s when we should hold a grudge?

“Do you think peace of mind can be found in holding a grudge…or harboring resentment…or wallowing in thoughts of what could have been? Me neither.” – Dr. Steven Maraboli

We never win by holding a grudge. All we end up doing is allowing the person who wronged us to fill our head space with negativity.

“Holding a grudge is like letting someone live rent free in your head.” -unknown

The reality is that holding the grudge, even if the facts prove that the other person deserves it, will only end up punishing the grudge-holder in the end. Sure, one can injure the other person emotionally and cause them to hurt, especially if it’s someone who genuinely valued the relationship. But over time they will be able to move past the hurt the grudge-holder is causing while the grudge-holder remains stuck in the vicious cycle of negativity and anger.

The only way to break the vicious cycle is to forgive the person who wronged you and let it go.

“Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.” – Jonathan Lockwood Hule

Keep in mind that forgiving and letting go doesn’t require you to continue associating with the person who wronged you. It may be best to quit and find a new job, or perhaps it’s best to let an employee or even a friendship go. Whether the person remains a part of your life or not, what does remain is the fact that forgiving and letting go of any grudges will bring you the peace you need to move forward with your own life in a positive way."

http://youtu.be/aARaYjgm_rA

There are times when I enjoy my rage. I do tease sometimes. My sadistic impulse. The dreamers of the day are dangerous men. T E Lawrence, a man without an identity, my fantasy hero. An effeminate fragile narcissist. He had blue eyes, like me. He had my body language; or is it the other way around? Sexualised by his mother; thankfully I was spared the gay thing. I only fancy women. Beaten and lashed by his father. Like my mother, an illegitimate child. Remember the scene in the David Lean film where Peter O'Toole parades along the top of a train. My mother did something similar in a fur coat on a work bench. She smacked her head of a rafter rather than take a bullet! And, get this. I was born on the summer solstice, just a few yards from where he died!