Our partner

My Experience - newbie

Munchausen Syndrome message board, open discussion, and online support group.

Moderator: Terry E.

My Experience - newbie

Postby coughcough » Sun Feb 05, 2017 2:26 am

Hey. My name is Rei. This post could be extremely triggering.


______________________________



Look I'm gonna cut to the chase on this; I want to be sick. I would give anything to contract a serious illness. Even a crippling one. Even a terminal one. If I were to notice symptoms of something serious, I would keep as quiet as possible until it's so bad I have to be hospitalized. I have dreams and fantasies of walking out to the train tracks and severing a leg. I'd be in physical therapy for months. Bonus points for infection.

I don't know what to do with this. I have severe anxiety and depression, as well as OCD and other numerous diagnoses. I see a therapist 2-3 times per week. Honestly I also think I'm passively suicidal. I pretty much know I'm passively suicidal. I struggle in school, with my friends, my family is a shitstorm. I'm going downhill and now I'm revisited by my time in the hospital. I didn't want to leave. My family put aside their strife to visit me. Friends talked to me for the first time in weeks. Schoolwork was waived. I enjoyed the pain and the sickness. It felt good to feel bad. I wouldn't lie to a doctor, but I'd take any excuse to see one.

I don't know what to do. I don't know how to talk about this. Anyone here who's been treated for munchausens? Any advice, words of encouragement.... anything? What helped you though hospital cravings?

Thanks.
coughcough
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Sun Feb 05, 2017 2:06 am
Local time: Thu Aug 24, 2017 12:36 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Return to Munchausen Syndrome Forum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron