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I'm not sure what this is, but it's bothering me.

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I'm not sure what this is, but it's bothering me.

Postby Cylris » Wed Aug 02, 2017 2:23 am

So, there was an event a fair amount of months ago that left me.. different? At my school we went to a camp for three straight days for science class. The experience was very mentally draining for me but it happened more slowly. I was not able to sleep at all. I would stay in my sleeping bag staring at the cabin ceiling for the whole night. It was like this for the two nights we spent there. The whole thing was mostly just school but for longer hours spent outside, which drained me a crazy amount. I also wasn't handling having to be around people all the time. At the time I had untreated depression and severe constant anxiety. (My depression and anxiety is being treated now, however they have worsened after this event a noticeable amount.) The whole thing I remember felt like torture. I was being stretched very thin mentally and there was no escape. After I came home it took me a while to stop thinking about what had happened. Afterwards though I found myself more depressed and anxious like I said. The thought of the camp annoys me slightly now, but not enough to be considered serious. I moved on but now I find myself every few months having nightmares about it, and even a very small reminder I had a few days ago made me have a nightmare the night it happened. I've never experienced any kind of psychological trauma like experiencing an extremely emotionally overwhelming event, being in extreme danger, and etc but I feel like I'm experiencing a much much smaller form of psychological trauma, but I have no experience with that sort of thing so I'm very unsure. This is bothering me and I'd like to tackle it somehow and become more familiar with it. It's a small thing but I feel like it's haunting me everywhere I go behind everything else, and I want to get rid of this feeling.
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Re: I'm not sure what this is, but it's bothering me.

Postby CoffeeBlood » Fri Aug 04, 2017 5:56 pm

i'm sorry you feel this way.

this sounds to me like mild PTSD symptoms. [post traumatic stress disorder]

for someone who can't be around too many people for a prolonged period of time, this science camp sounds like a traumatic event.

if your depression and anxiety are being treated, so you have a therapist?, it would be a good idea to ask them if you have PTSD as well [or signs of it].
be warned though, that most therapists are specialized in a field, and therefore not all of them know how to treat PTSD.

What i know you need right now, is to feel safe - usually routines can make a person feel safe. staying as little as possible in crowded places...

next time a field trip like this gets planned, get a doctor's notice to allow you to skip it. [best way to protect yourself in the future]. PTSD can really interfere with a person's ability to function properly, and given your depression and anxiety, it could get worse in the future.

[all advice comes from personal experience in dealing with my partner's PTSD who also suffers from depression and anxiety]
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Re: I'm not sure what this is, but it's bothering me.

Postby realityhere » Sun Aug 06, 2017 9:23 pm

Is it possible that you experienced agoraphobia, a fear of open public places with many ppl? If you continue to have anxiety for fear of a panic attack in a similar situation, this may be something you should discuss with your therapist.
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