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All of a sudden i am going extremly crazy.

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All of a sudden i am going extremly crazy.

Postby dimleadero » Sat Feb 11, 2017 11:12 pm

Friends i am in the edge of going insane and i dont know what to do. First pardon my bad english its not my native language.. First a quick history of me- 25 old male from Europe. When i was in early teens i had an episode of delusions that lasted a few months- i believed that i am cursed or something like that, but those thoughts dissapeared on their own. I always thought since than that those were some childish things and it will never happened again. I've never had any problems ever since until the last couple of months. I started to get paranoid about someone spying on me, on my social media accounts and so on. I do realize that this is just paranoia but my mind refuses to accept it. I started to suspect people around me, i've left my girlfriend and so on.But thats not the worst. Now here is my situation- i have also a health problem in the last couple of years. Now it's not something dangerous (Thank God) and it does not affect my mental health, but its a thing and every 6 months or so i am requried to do normal routine exams just to make sure everything is ok. They are like regular blood tests and have non importance- just as a protective measures. Now my mom is a doctor so i let her take care of the tests, documents and so on. However, i hate giving blood and so on not to mention i am always on the run to work, and these test have dealines like on certain date, sometimes it happpned that she used her blood samples or my father's just so those tests to pass, otherwise there will be penalty on me. Now dont get me wrong- those test are really usless and there is no point of doing them every six months, but the healthcare in my counrty is super crappy and they invent all kinds of formalities just to make you lose your insurance and pay for the medicines yourself. Like they give you date and if you are unable to go on time you lose your free meds for the next 6 months. Now i am very thankfull to my mom for taking care of all those things for me- she does all the documentation and takes the medicines, if i do that on my own it would mean going around pharmacies and hospitals for many days and hours each six months.

However i started to get paranoid about if we did something wrong. What if the labs take some secret dna test with the blood they get? And since sometimes it was not my blood what if now they have wrong account of me and have like dna samples that are not mine. What if my father did something wrong in the past and now they accuse me since we used his blood samples sometimes. Now i talked with my mom and she says these things are crazy, those labs dont test for dna but only the most common blood work, the results themselves are not of any importance and are only temporary, they are just formality.

But i am losing my mind on this. Suddenly one night it planted in my mind and i dont know what to do. Dont get me wrong, my mom is perfect doctor she always monitors my health and so on, and she does those things to spare me the hours of waiting for some stupid formalities, and i know there is nothing to worry, but my mind creates all types of scenarios even to a point that these test have some extreme unversal importance and even after i am death they will still remain bounded to my name. I know this makes no sence but ithink for this 24/7 and i dont know what to do. I cant sleep i wake up in the middle of the night fearing about that and i dream about it. I even though for a moment for suicide :X And i have whole life ahead of me, cant belive something like this cause such a horror in my mind. Pleasae give me some advices on what to do :(
Thanks
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Re: All of a sudden i am going extremly crazy.

Postby DamagedSpaceCat » Wed Feb 15, 2017 10:29 pm

I can't relate too much but I don't want you to worry so I'm replying. I don't know your family (only you do) or your country's health system so all I can go off is what you said.. and it sounds like you admitted you don't have anything to worry about, so I would advise you to stop there and just not worry or think on it any longer.

If they test for blood type (like O+, A-, etc) then technically your parents' could be different than yours, but they would have said something by now if there was an issue. And they don't have any reason to keep your blood after you die, so don't worry about that. Do you think your paranoia could be schizophrenia? My husband's friend had similar paranoia and was diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Try not to worry about all those things, I know it's difficult.
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Re: All of a sudden i am going extremly crazy.

Postby Contemplation » Thu Feb 16, 2017 3:47 am

Hey dimleadero

I think the problem is that they don't tell you what exactly they do with your blood.
I mean, it's a part of your body. It will regenerate but still, they have it and do something with it (tests).

So your paranoia might be a signal that you want to know exactly what they are doing with that red body fluid you send them. But that isn't possible. It's sent to a laboratory where they analyse thousand of samples every day in large machines and with the help of computers. It's all very efficient and nobody working there cares if the blood you sent is yours! Really, they don't! I know doctors personnally and they work so much, they don't have time to think about you, they only search for the disease in your blood.

They would say: "It's in your interest to send your own blood. If you send someone else's blood, the results won't tell us about you and if you get sick but you sent your father's blood we won't see your disease and you might be in danger."

So they trust you. but your mother - as a doctor - knows that. That little trick was her idea you said? It's a typical bad idea doctors have. Because she doesn't care whether it's your blood or not, but you care. And I think you are right to care. She's overstepping her authority here.

You have to take this in your own hands if you want the paranoia to stop. You need to take back control. If you can, find a way to make sure it's your blood and your blood only that is sent for testing.

One more argument - this time a logical one, not an emotional, power-structure related one - to help battling your paranoia:

The laboratory couldn't know if the blood is from your or your father even if they did a DNA test.
Your DNA and the DNA of your father are different but only slightly. to find out that it's not your blood but his is very expensive and they only do that after you have already become the suspect of a crime, in order to prove it. yet, it's a medicinal laboratory, not CSI: Las Vegas.

I'm not trying to call you stupid, not at all! You say your English is bad, but it's very good. So you're smart but if you're smart you need to take responsibility (because you can :P ) maybe the paranoia is just yourself trying to push you towards taking that responsibility.

Tell your mother that it is not ok what is going on right now. Then you have to do what you have to do to make sure it's really your blood that is tested. Maybe then the paranoia will stop!

Kind Regards
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