How 2 deal with fatalism & bad self-fulfilling prophecies??

I'm generally a pretty negative guy and certainly not a born optimist.To me negative things always seem more possible. It’s seems like life's non-physics version of entropy and why life is so ridiculously fragile as well as how Finagle's law is just a step away and how the negatives always outnumber the positives. Someone in particular has said various times now that I have a very fatalistic way of thinking although more specifically I think that I can be more like a determined defeatist (failure is the only outcome but I press on anyways).

It has been the reason and justified my feeling for always preparing for the worst on whatever endeavour I do along with viewing all motives and intentions with skepticism and suspicion and to make sure my accomplishments are certain in their presence and there's no way that they can mess up. I mean how else do you explain why so many bad things can happen or so many things can go wrong but so little ever turn out right. So much struggle in life seems to be such a horrendous waste of time, energy and resources since most of the time by the time you do accomplish one thing you’re a level behind where you’re supposed to be and if you ever do catch up it will only be a big energy sucking personal expense.

Yes I know that I shouldn’t feel and/or think this way but I feel that to not do so, to not have this perpetual pain cling to me would be to ignore something so prevalent it would gradually result in mental instability and then some. I might be very fatalistically negative not really expecting happiness and always fearing loss but I’ve learned to accept this inescapable reality and to motor through it trying to be feel at least marginally pleasant while being respectful, selfless, and kind while ever expecting reward or little to no reciprocation. I won’t be surprised if anyone personally criticizes and/or comments on me.

Being very prone to fatalistic thinking also has made me very subject to self-fulfilling prophecies.The con of this is that if I have a bad initial impression a/o thoughts about something my mind and I will very much cling to that and not allow any change to happen largely out of fear and what seems like ruin that was meant to be.I'm now aware that this results in these thoughts becoming "self-fulfilling prophecies",the bad kind.What can I do to stop this?.

Please if you do feel that way don’t be reluctant to do so. I'm open to hearing such honest replies. It helps get all the truth out you see. Yes I know there’s a greater reality. But I permanently got cut off of it a long time ago as a toddler b/c my decisions of action (and more so often b/c of inaction) which unbeknownst to me drifted me off to this.

Hi Xod -

First off, I gotta say that you write very eloquently. You're definitely not alone with thinking this way and having a perpetual negative outlook on things. I mean, there's a lot of evidence all around us that would prompt that mindset. Some people experience very little positive events in their lives, we look around and see other's suffering as well, it's hard to believe in a positivity, and sometimes it can seem as though optimism is wishful thinking and delusional. I hope I'm not putting your words in your mouth, this is just my personal response.

I can't say that I've experienced too many positive events in my life. I think back and I've experienced a lot of pain and rejection - a lot of anxiety and depression as well. And when I look into the future, I see the same, as it doesn't seem as though I'm heading in the right direction. And I can become cynical at times. The only happiness and pure positivity that I have ever experienced would be in childhood. The innocence of childhood seems very pure and genuine, in my experience. A lot of people had traumatizing childhoods, which always makes me sad, because I think innocent childhood is the closest we will ever get to true nirvana. (I use that term very loosely here, not related to religion).

I'm gonna assume that you've had a lot of negative events in your life? Or perhaps something that produced apathy? That's usually the reason people become cynical and defeatist, whatever adjective you want to use. I'm often negative, defeatist, and I'm probably prone to many instances of self-fulfilling prophecies, I'm sure of it. My negative thinking and beliefs surely do affect the outcome of what happens, or what doesn't happen, in my life. Despite that, there are times when I can feel joy and happiness and optimism. They come in very simple events, very simple feelings. They are few and far between, but they are there, and they remind me deeply of the innocence of childhood.

Sorry if I rambled for a bit, those are thoughts that I had in response to your post.

- EGD.

Take a look at the book "Law of attraction" or the movie "The Secret". They talk about the mind and feeling about how you think can atrract those types of things. Life is always going to hand you lemons, you need to choose whether or not you want to paint them gold or let them rott. If you looked on google and see little things to be grateful for, it'll kinda open your eyes about the little things you forget to appreciate. If you also try to communicate more with positive people you can try and mirror their attitudes towards life and it will help. I hit a rough patch myself on and off over the last 3 years. When I thought things couldn't get worse, they did, and it was all things completely out of my control. I felt the world was against me. Once I found someone with positive thinking and found things to be grateful for, things started falling more and more in line. Then I discovered that book, Law of Attraction... And it really helped me.

Pieces wrote:Take a look at the book "Law of attraction"[...]

do you mean the Micael Losier book?