A new low....

Hi everyone,

It's been awhile since I've posted and one of my last ones was a proclamation that I was quitting for good

That didn't happen and my reckless behavior yesterday has left me feeling my lowest ever

How crazy is it that decisions made in a span of 6 hours can crush you financially and break your spirit to the point that it may take months to recover!

This pattern has to end....losing big, being good until I recover, then losing big again and starting the process all over again

This time I'm truly hoping I can break the cycle, but the days and weeks ahead are going to be extremely tough regardless

What really sucks is that I would give anything to fast forward to a month from now so I could feel better now - this is no way to live and I know that, but I wouldn't wish the feelings I have right now on anyone

Thanks for listening

This happens or has happened to everyone here. What you can do right now is write a journal on how your feeling at this point. Go into details as to what made you gamble. Did you have the feeling that every addict has "I'm feeling lucky today... I feel like I'm going to win" or were you just bored. What could have stopped you from going? What would you like to remind yourself in the future to keep you from going again? Keep this somewhere safe, so the next time you feel like gambling, remind yourself to read your journal first. Learn from your experiences and do not ignore that other voice that is more rational. Keep your head up & stay strong, because the next test is in a couple of weeks.

petemon wrote:Hi everyone,

It's been awhile since I've posted and one of my last ones was a proclamation that I was quitting for good

That didn't happen and my reckless behavior yesterday has left me feeling my lowest ever

How crazy is it that decisions made in a span of 6 hours can crush you financially and break your spirit to the point that it may take months to recover!

This pattern has to end....losing big, being good until I recover, then losing big again and starting the process all over again

This time I'm truly hoping I can break the cycle, but the days and weeks ahead are going to be extremely tough regardless

What really sucks is that I would give anything to fast forward to a month from now so I could feel better now - this is no way to live and I know that, but I wouldn't wish the feelings I have right now on anyone

Thanks for listening

Pete,

It is time to make a real effort to quit. Typing on your computer and venting your feelings is nice but get off your butt and get to a GA meeting. Don't be cynical, take in what you hear and tell the truth.

After you are done with the meeting take some time and think about what you've heard. Concentrate on the positives, don't worry about the things you didn't like.

Then, do it again tomorrow and keep going until you've been paid again and haven't gambled it away.

Thanks to you both for your reply and support

About the journal idea - I wrote in mine on Friday night that "I shouldn't go on Saturday unless I'm really itching to" and that my max loss could not exceed $200

Turns out I wasn't that motivated to go, but went anyway because I was bored. And, the $200 was gone 1/2 hour after I got there and is only a fraction of what I lost

One good thing is I can finally admit that I'm an addict because I really cannot control myself when I lose $ quickly because I chase it by hitting up a credit card and lose even more than the cash I had initially

Gotta run for now, but GA is something I would consider because I do need help

Thanks again to you both

Pete

Petemmon, your still playing with fire, Eventually you will get burned. Don't give gambling an excuse. I use to tell myself I can gamble as long as I meet the following criteria. I end up losing more that what I had planned most of the time. If you want to quit you need to stop completely otherwise you will play out this cycle over and over losing thousands of dollars. Please attend a GA meeting, so you can hear others talk about their addiction.