Do Alters Just "Go Away"??

My fiance has DID. I was the first to encounter his alters Aries and Logan and he has yet to talk to a professional. His alters were around for a really long time and then one at a time they said they felt like they were "fading away."
And sure enough, they faded away and haven't come back. How do I know if they are really gone? Is it still necessary for him to talk to a professional?

I have experienced that same "fading away" phenomenon. Two of the alters in the system started being present less and less until they "faded away." They weren't needed anymore (and I never liked them anyway). A few weeks later, I found myself and my other have inherited some aspects that the two who faded away used to have. A theory we have is that it was some form of integration, but I'm not entirely sure. Nevertheless there doesn't seem to be anything wrong since they left, other than me having some conflicting feelings, but that's not unusual haha.

I hope my experience helped.

I've had a lot of experiences with "fading away" I just consider it almost like integration. Their personalities and essences never *go away* they just become parts of others. at one time I had two alters who shared a LOT of similarities. One alter literally absorbed the other, as the other simply "faded away".

What a relief! I had been hoping in the back on my mind that some sort of integration had occurred. I just assumed that there was no way he could have achieved that without the help of a therapist. Thanks for giving me reasons to be hopeful!

Thank you for asking the question. We've had 4 leave recently and are grieving the losses - all my parts are important to me and especially the first 2 kids we ever knew about. One picked up another, they said 'it's time for us to go, our job here is done' and just walked until they faded out. The other two climbed to the top of a hill, followed by the rest of the crew, then the simply walked off and into thin air, disappearing. We've always wondered where they've gone. Our therapist feels they are healed/that their job is done and we agree, but we hope that wherever they are, they are happy and safe. We don't want them to be completely gone as they have been such a massive part of our lives for the past 3.5 years. We miss simple things such as Hannah choosing purple socks in the morning or being able to walk into a dark room without her crying that she wants the lights on. There's a sadness, yet there is also a sense of peace.

Getting back to the question. When we were at secondary school (over 10 years ago) we had Kimmy and Ishkha, we know because they were writing notes to others of the crew (At the time we just thought it was us being strange writing different names) but a couple of months ago we remembered they had existed.....yet they aren't around anymore. We have no idea when they left but it would have been before we started therapy so yes I believe they can go without the help of someone else.

I'm glad it's not just me! I don't know if they're gone or whether they've just not been out in a looong time...

Sophie *****TW***** had a rape and abuse fantasy and she convinced my ex boyfriend to rape her and he was violent to her anyway and as soon as I got with my new boyfriend who is caring and sweet, she knew that that was over and she disappeared. I don't know if she's gone for sure though. ******TW******

Aaron appeared before I even knew I had alters and I wanted a sex change because of him, he's switched out a fair few times since I discovered my alters but never since he took my a Level exams for me in 2011 (A*AA )

I had a new alter called Rebekkah that is obsessed with my boyfriend, like painfully obsessed. She was convinced he didn't like her/love her and she was seriously unbalanced, any small indication he didn't like her (whether she was out at the time or not) resulted in a big kick off from her. But as she started to trust him etc he started to fade away too.

I don't know if it's just when the alters themselves resolve their own issues by being out enough to deal with them?

@ Aaron-- the boy in my head does my homework for me It seems surprising that a name with enough intelligence behind him to ace an exam would leave you though =/ Wasn't he emotionally attached to his own existence? Not to dredge up old injuries or anything just... I kind of want to get to know you =P And more people like us. I want to see where these fault lines form. F and I both have emotions and intellect-- goals, romantic attractions even, but I get the sense that two very clean pieces is not usually the way the cookie crumbles. Hearts in some places, heads in the others. Christ this is all so cool.

EDIT: Wait, I read that wrong! I thought you said he took your exams and then he never came back XD Imagine though, an alter with that as their 'final stand.' Like man that test was really hanging over his head.

"I don't know if it's just when the alters themselves resolve their own issues by being out enough to deal with them?"

ooh. this brings up a good point here. I'm actually hoping that mine will do that. Or at least return to a stable or semi-stable state.

I've also suffered literal deaths, where an alter fragments so much they expire. There are pieces that usually get picked up by others and integrated though.

But it could just be the system that I have right now. Also my girlfriend is very anti-death so I make sure everything gets put back into something else. The circle of life goes on.