Please Help :Trigger warniing

I feel like i'm splitting in half, i'm having memories of my life and it feels like i'm looking at myself from the 3rd person. This person feels like the person that keeps trying to jump out of my skin that is behind me right now.

I suddenly remembered my old boss's phone number and asked if he would employ me again and then all the memories came back and I got a pressure headache, It literally feels like my skull is splitting in half. I'm getting a bunch of flashes during the period of time i worked for him and they are all very very negative feelings.

When I think of working for him before All I can think of are extremely negative and maniacal feelings going through the "other" me.

What have you guys done in situations like this.

I just took a double dose of viseral but other than that the headahce is still there. music helps sometimes.

Hi Greg,

It sounds like there is a lot coming up for you. You need to try and ground yourself – this should help ease the flashbacks.

I found this which gives lots of examples of how to do this http://www.bcbhr.org/Articles.aspx?7

Hope this helps

P.S I get severe head pain that feels like that too.

Thank you. I will try these now.

Cool. It really does work, you just need to find the techniques that work best for you. Listening to music helps me, feeling the ground beneath my feet or the chair I'm sitting on, or smelling something nice are my favourites – anything that helps you focus on the present moment.

Also, a technique my therapist taught me works really well when having a lot of old, strong, trauma emotions coming up is the 'Butterfly Hug'. It is an EMDR technique... Here is a video of the technique – the movement is shown at 2.08 minutes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npNegFO1l00 You can do it slowly , for as long as you like. I have only been taught the one where she crosses her arms and taps each upper arm, one side at a time – this also really helps me and all the parts.

I tried some of those techniques and started walking around a bit and felt much better thank you. (Also, some of it could have been from the vistareal :/)

I've done similar things like this before without knowing that they were grounding exercises. However, it almost seems like after i've read about dissociative disorders and have been able to identify them its almost as if everything is more "amplified" because I am paying closer attention to it.

Music has always been something i've done to rid myself of the headache as well. (Before I figured out that there actually are disorders that describe the ways i've felt my entire life) For me it has to be LOUD.

I also kind of pace back and forth or walk around. I used to pace back and forth whenever I had a cigarette and didn't even notice I did this until someone told me one day.

Its a very strange feeling to feel a sort of "trauma" of myself looking at myself. It was like a full blown identity fight and nothing was "out front" they were just battling inside while I was "Derealed" and "Floating" on the outside, which brought on the splitting headache.

Do you get these 3rd person flashback traumas as well?

Hi Greg,

I tried some of those techniques and started walking around a bit and felt much better thank you. (Also, some of it could have been from the vistareal :/)

Great

I've done similar things like this before without knowing that they were grounding exercises. However, it almost seems like after i've read about dissociative disorders and have been able to identify them its almost as if everything is more "amplified" because I am paying closer attention to it.

It's amazing how we find ways to survive with things all by ourself. I also used to use some of these grounding techniques when I felt floaty and above my head or anxious – in particular the feeling of my feet on the ground and shifting weight.

I've noticed the feeling of it being more intense too if you focus in on it. But my T has taught me to notice them and then ground.

Music has always been something i've done to rid myself of the headache as well. (Before I figured out that there actually are disorders that describe the ways i've felt my entire life) For me it has to be LOUD.

I love it loud too – my neighbours don't!

Its a very strange feeling to feel a sort of "trauma" of myself looking at myself. It was like a full blown identity fight and nothing was "out front" they were just battling inside while I was "Derealed" and "Floating" on the outside, which brought on the splitting headache.

Do you get these 3rd person flashback traumas as well?

Yes I do. With regards to identity and knowing who I am it is very complicated! I understand that me and all parts are who I am (I said in unison ) but this feels so fragmented – memories, thoughts, consciousness.

I experience this 'battling inside' and lose touch with the present moment (what's going on in the outer world) all the time when there is a lot going on in my inner world. I guess we have only so much consciousness, and if parts are using that for something else then there is less to go around. With battling, and parts trying to front, I also experience really sharp, splitting head pain, migraines and headaches.

With floating outside, I experience it more like I am aware of the space 1 meter above my head. But perhaps grounding helps me with this? If you ever feel floaty (dissociated), try and do the grounding techniques with the conscious space you have. You can encourage parts to do this too – it will help them feel better.


With '3rd person flashback traumas', yes I do see what parts of ourself remember and feel what they feel (or know what they're feeling). With flashbacks, sometimes they are very visually clear and last 1/2 minutes (unless I choose to ground and stop them) and sometimes they are just flashes and last 2 seconds. *TW* I also suffer with feeling fashbacks (intense terror), body memories and somatisation. *End TW*

Flashbacks are hard to process as although I know it is of things that happened to us, it feels like these experiences are not mine. It is hard to truly own the memories as yet.

-- Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:38 pm --

P.S Walking and jogging also really help me ground. And I've read that both can help with processing memories and feelings through engaging the left and right side of the brain through movement.