lifelongthing wrote:You might not hear their replies, even if they do reply. And just like you might not hear them, they might not hear you. So this would equate you should definitely keep talking. Sometime they might hear it and sometime they might answer

Interesting thing you wrote. I read an article somewhere about that alters communicate in lots of different ways and that you should be open for everything - just because you talk to them doesn't mean they'll necessarily
talk to you, some alters maybe express themselves better through writing/drawing etc. It could be that the answers are right in front of you without you even notice. I don't understand though - if they don't hear me and I don't hear them, why would I talk to them?

You mean that just because they don't hear me/I don't hear them at first, doesn't mean that they'll never hear me/I'll never hear them?
tomboy24 wrote:All of my alters chose their own name except for Ray. Ray was named by my boyfriend, since he was the first one to meet her. He gave her a list of options/ideas he had, and she chose Ray.
Most of my alters have "name-searched" through me. I've found myself looking up baby names and name meanings on the internet and been like, "Hmm...ok?". The names I find and save usually end up belonging to alters that soon surface/come forward. (Sometimes they'll save a couple name options and then end up choosing one from the options they liked).
Before I knew I had DID, I just figured I was looking for names for characters in my writings.
You might not be able to hear them right now, or communications might need some work before you can write/talk to them, or they might be a bit scared to actually truly come forward still. There could be many reasons for why they're seeming to not give you answers. They also might be content with the names you gave them, and that's fine, too. It might just take some time to actually find out. All your questions won't magically be answered over night.
To communicate you can try talking out loud to yourself/your alters, talking in your head (so, with thoughts) to yourself/your alters, or writing/typing notes to your alters.
Try doing this before trying communication though: Make yourself feel as safe, comfortable, and relaxed as possible. Anything like a safety blanket or favorite comfy clothes or something wear/have with you. The more safe, comfortable, and relaxed you feel, the more comfortable your alters might feel. And the more calm your mind is, the less chance there is of being communication interference and subconscious "mind blocks". Reassure yourself and them a bit, too. Let them know they're safe, it's safe to talk if they wish to, you're safe, the environment's safe (if it is), everything's safe and ok, and you only want to help/get to know them, and it's ok for them to come forward if they feel ok with it. Lots of times alters and systems are wary because they've spent so long hiding, they have to be reassure that it's ok to be known now, it's ok to come out now. You can handle this now.
My alters picked their names either from researching name meanings (like Kat used to go by "Kataki" which is Japanese for "revenge"), or from baby name lists, or from other influences like movies I really liked or favorite books of our's or something like that. Like Dallas, his name came from the book "The Outsiders". Damone's name came from the movie "Fast Times At Ridgemont High". Valera's name is a Russian name that means "strong". Cassie's name came from the nickname I used to go by as a kid. Lynn's name is my middle name. Marie's name was my mom's middle name. There's all sorts of different options for where names can be picked from and come from, and sometimes there's reason behind the name, and sometimes they just like the name. Long as they're ok with the name, that's all that matters.
-Cassandra
Thank you, this is very interesting and helpful info! Especially on how to talk to them.
Can it ever be "too late" to get to know your alters? I've searched a bit on how to communicate with alters before but I haven't really had time or have taken the effort to actually do something. Your idea with feeling safe and comfortable sounds good, wearing comfy clothes etc. You think it could be a good idea to try to have a day of the week/of the month (depending on when is a good opportunity) when I sit down like that and talk a bit? Maybe sharing things with them from my daily life/thoughts about ourselves etc? I'm thinking that maybe that way they'll feel like I'm giving them a time where it's just them and me, that we can really be together. And by talking about things maybe they feel like I'm trusting them, or at least appreciating them/letting them know that I see them.
About the environment. At mom's there's no time to have this kind of conversation/time with them. I have to do it at dad's at night, because then no one will be up and I can be on my own. On the other hand bad things has happened in the past at dad's... You think maybe that will trigger anyone? At mom's it's not very safe now though, so maybe it's an even bigger trigger being there... But that's not an option anyways (I have no time alone there).
The thing is no one in my family knows about this multiplicity-thing. In the past I tried telling them about it but one of my alters was very scared and didn't want me to, but when I did because I couldn't handle being alone with it, I got no support from family or anyone. They thought I was crazy and said it was only thoughts and feelings, which hurt this alter that didn't want me to talk about it in the first place, a lot... Anyways that's a whole other story. I'm just explaining in case anyone wonders why I have to have these "meetings" with my alters at night/when no one knows.
I don't want to be forgotten.