does depression make you disgusted with people

i mostly get disgusted with people and angry at them. i generally cannot stand them and their verbal dribble. i want to be left alone. a lot of times when people are talking to me i want to peel off my skin with my fingernails and make them go away. even if they are saying something nice and 'pleasant.' i am tired of my therapist saying ' that's the depression talking' i want to quit the treatments with her and the meds because it's all a load of B.S. far as I can tell. 3 years, 3 different meds, 3 different therapists, and not any results, so far i am slipping back to the way i used to be before the meds. so what's the point? i cant find a single thing on this planet worth sticking around for. i dont have a S.O. children, or friends (except online, 2 or 3), not close to my family either. i might miss few things but they are material. SO WHAT IS THE POINT THEN? do anybody ever feel any of these things with Cl. Depression? ty

I read pain in your post. I read a lot of anger too. Anger means you are close to coming to a truth sometimes. Out of concern I am going to be blunt. We are all as sick as our secrets. Your secrets are making you angry and depressed. What I would suggest is that you get brutally honest with your feelings and your reasons for all this anger. Take control over how your therapy is going. Shake things up and get brutally honest in sessions. You have nothing to loose right? I know you may You feel your at the bottom, but now you have to dig deeper into yourself. Get ugly honest and you will get through this. The only way out is through. The mud is thick for a little while and then you reach the other side and things get easier.
I have been where you are and I swear it worked for me. I recovered fully and you can too!
With care,
One

Honestly it took me about 4 pdocs and over 10 anti depressants over almost 3yrs till I got the right combination.

I understand your feelings, I would be sad for a time then really angry.

All I can suggest is it can get better but maybe you need to kick some butt and find yourself a new therapist or better yet a pdoc who has the experience with the meds and don't feel guilty if you have to keep changing them till you find the one that works best for you, because you're the most important one!

Seneca said; "where fear is, happiness is not" and is depression not an opposite of happiness?

Yoda said; "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to suffering. I sense much fear in you"

and Joan Rivers is attributed this quote; "Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief, and, most of all, fear."

Depression, BPD, NPD, etc. are all external symptoms of battling against our internal fears. To repress them, to deny them, to beat them back.

Often we are better off accepting, facing and processing our fears rather than fighting them or running away from them...

...isn't that what therapy aims to achieve?

Depression, for me, exists within the existential realm.

Humankind feels alien, and disgusting to me. Parasitic, pathogenic. People on the streets, on the subway, they look like bacteria to me. And I am just another one of their disgusting ranks.

I work in healthcare, so this becomes a continual, daily struggle. I work in a field which dedicates itself to the perpetuation of the species, and dedicates itself to trying to minimize human death, despair, and destruction.

But, honestly?

We should all perish. We are parasites on this earth, only good at killing one another. Everything we do is at the expense of another organism. I hate the fact that, in order to survive through a single day, I have to kill plants to survive, and contribute to pollution.

So, yeah. Depression makes me disgusted with people. Or maybe gives me just enough insight to see how putrid we all are.

biitchelectric wrote:Depression, for me, exists within the existential realm.

Humankind feels alien, and disgusting to me. Parasitic, pathogenic. People on the streets, on the subway, they look like bacteria to me. And I am just another one of their disgusting ranks.

I work in healthcare, so this becomes a continual, daily struggle. I work in a field which dedicates itself to the perpetuation of the species, and dedicates itself to trying to minimize human death, despair, and destruction.

But, honestly?

We should all perish. We are parasites on this earth, only good at killing one another. Everything we do is at the expense of another organism. I hate the fact that, in order to survive through a single day, I have to kill plants to survive, and contribute to pollution.

So, yeah. Depression makes me disgusted with people. Or maybe gives me just enough insight to see how putrid we all are.

Exactly.

I used to feel this way too. Until I realized that my disgust towards others was just as much toward myself and it is much more enjoyable to live life APPRECIATING WHAT YOU HAVE rather than hating everyone. Also, it comes from a very elitist, high and mighty place to be disgusted by everyone. I remember thinking that I was smarter than everyone, that no one had anything intellegent to say and I couldn't be bothered with listening to their stupid small talk and their idiocy. But then, I grew up. I turned my attention inward and I fixed myself up doing things I love and focusing on improving myself and my life. This was after I had been prescribed everything from Prozac to Haldol and had seen umpteen million therapists. I haven't seen a therapist in several years and I don't take anything now except birth control, and honestly, that helped a lot too because my mood swings were directly related to my hormones and my menstrual cycle. Yeah, "human beings" (PS. YOU ARE ONE) are wasteful, gross and pathetic. Life is a sitcom, not a soap opera. Perspective is everything.