A little help or understanding. by
Littlesammiex on Tue Jul 03, 2012 3:21 am
I wrote this the other night so I thought I'd just copy it on here to see if someone can relate to me. I don't understand why I can not make up my mind any more. I am constantly changing my mind on my career (even after I've spent hundreds on new courses etc) I get easily bored and end up completely hating the idea. This can happen with friends , lovers and even down to my hair colour. my boyfriend has now left because I pushed him out, always thinking he thought so little of me , I started acting up, I would say such horrible things then I would beg him back then two mins later kick him out again but secretly I want him to run back with open arms, a bit like a movie. I have started cutting my self to relieve the constant thinking , I sent everyone texts saying I was going to jump under a train but luckily I got arrested for being aggressive to the train conductor. I am normally agreesive to shop workers etc unless Im in a really happy mood and feel confident( these moods are not coming around that often). Ism at wits end as my doctor said I was depressed and sent me on my way, I'm not depressed I am happy sometimes ,really happy where I'm dancing round and planning away.....mom confused I'm 26 and my life is just stuck on repeat.