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- February 2013
My DID System Map 2013
   Fri Feb 15, 2013 12:10 am

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My DID System Map 2013

Permanent Linkby tomboy24 on Fri Feb 15, 2013 12:10 am

*First Level*:

-- Kat, 24
-Role: Protector
-Ex-role: Abuser-Protector
-Type: Apparently Normal Part (ANP) with Emotional Part (EP) tendencies
-Previous name(s): Katherine, Kataki
-Believed to have "as an alter": Anger Management Issues, slight PTSD
-About: Defends and protects Cassandra and other alters from harm. Provides guidance, criticism, and strength. Is powerful, unafraid to be physical with people, can be violent, rough, has a dangerous temper, slightly antisocial, blunt, realistic, can be negative, strong, never wavers or breaks under stress, untrusting, stubborn, sarcastic. Usually has a "f*#k-off" attitude.

Is an older sister and somewhat of a father-figure to Cassandra and other alters. Has a general hatred for males, usually only looks to use them for own personal gain. Approves of Cassandra's boyfriend Michael/Mike, used to date him and can see herself dating him again, still loves/cares for him but prefers to have her freedom and be single right now (however, she remains respectful/loyal to Mike when necessary/appropriate).

Is slightly bisexual, mainly preferring guys but also having interests in girls.

-- Rain, 23
-Previous name(s): Riyoku
-Role: Caretaker
-Type: ANP
-Believed to have "as an alter": Slight OCD, Possibly slight PTSD, Slight Depression
-About: Was the main opponent of Kataki when she was abusive to Cassandra and other alters. Still disagrees with Kat/Kataki at times, but both are learning to co-exist peacefully with each other and work well together. Provides guidance, comfort, reassurance, and advice. Is supportive, strong, optimistic, determined, confident yet humble, stands up for herself/her views/her beliefs, gives everything her best effort, is wise and thoughtful.

Younger sister to Kat/Katherine, older sister to Cassandra and other alters. Is a mother-figure to everyone. Very forgiving and selfless. Is also Michael's girlfriend, and desires a long-term relationship with him, hopefully ending in marriage. Is very loyal to him.

Is straight and only attracted to males.

-- Cassandra, 21
-Role: Host
-Type: ANP
-Officially Diagnosed With: Depression, Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Visual Hallucinations- Cause Unknown, and Possible DID (thanks to a skeptical psychologist)
-Possible Additional Diagnoses (things we believe we may have and want to be evaluated for): OCD, (Slight) Autism, DID (for certain, not "possible")
-About: Deals with everyday life and attempts to help "evenly express" alters' feelings, thoughts, etc. Shy at first, friendly, helpful, caring, selfless, open-minded, emotional, low confidence, can get easily stressed, often indecisive, responsible, goal-oriented, sometimes impulsive.

Still a teen at heart, being unsure of herself, having trouble living on her own, and wanting to just have fun in life. Loyal to her boyfriend Michael and loves him, although isn't as sure of her desire to be with/stay with him as she used to be. Finds herself wanting to space/freedom more often. She does know that so far, she eventually wants to marry him.

Is slightly bisexual. Finds both guys and girls equally attractive, but prefers to be with and date guys.

-- Shay/Shadow, 20
-Role: Possible Memory/Emotion Holder/Keeper, or Memory Recorder/Keeper
-Type: Possible ANP with EP tendencies
-Believed to have "as an alter": Autism, OCD, Anxiety, Possibly Slight Insomnia
-About: Usually rather quiet, not very social, somewhat shy, prefers to do activities by herself, has "tics" that she can't control (usually physical, like a hand "wave" or something), is easily stressed/overwhelmed, prefers to be as independent as possible, prone to emotional outbursts- especially when overwhelmed/stressed, is easily frustrated, gives everything her best effort, has trouble connecting with others and expressing herself, dislikes change (in plans, schedules, routines,...

[ Continued ]

0 Comments Viewed 1397 times

Daily schedule (for my DID system/alters)

Permanent Linkby tomboy24 on Tue Dec 11, 2012 5:17 pm

What to do: (this is to help everyone, including myself, remember what to do each day :D )

--Wake up (anywhere from 5:30am-8am)
--Eat breakfast (watch cartoons while eating)
--After breakfast, get ready (shower, get dressed, brush teeth, etc)
--Look at your plans for the day
--Start chores (dishes, laundry, food shopping, and anything else that needs to be done- including job searching stuff!)
--Either after, in-between, or during chores, there's computer time (as long as the chores get done!)
--Either after, in-between, or during chores, EAT LUNCH
--After chores, time for a walk (this is optional if you're going to work out with Mike later, or if you're going to walk with Mike later)
--After walk, free time for whatever (computer, TV, etc)
--When Mike is home: NO COMPUTER unless he's playing video games, on his phone, or you're watching TV that you don't really care about. There is a 1 hour time limit to finish up anything you want on the computer after he gets home.
--After Mike gets home: finish chores if needed, if going for a walk or to work out have a snack, after exercise cook dinner, then it's free time with Mike.
--Go to the bedroom (anywhere from 10:30pm-12am)
--Before going to sleep, write down your plans for the next day
--Go to sleep

0 Comments Viewed 19689 times

Not So Alone After All

Permanent Linkby tomboy24 on Mon Aug 01, 2011 9:13 pm

Hi. My name is Cassandra, but I go by Sandra for short. I doubt anyone will read this, but if feels nice to write things out. I'm new to this site, just joined this morning, and already feel less lonely. While looking throughout the forums, it was nice to read about people going through similar situations I've gone through and feeling similar emotions. It was also nice to read about advice given by people who've dealt with or are dealing with similar situations and who I can identify with. Especially with the personality disorders forum, it was comforting to read about other people who have the same disorders I do and give each other advice and help.

Allow me to start things off bluntly. I'm 20 years old, struggling to live on my own, and have been living on my own since I was 17. After being removed from my dad's house by the state, I was put into counseling where I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Rapid Cycling Bipolar disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Depression, and anxiety problems. Already interested in psychology and taking classes in school, learning my diagnoses simply fueled further interest and research, which helped me a lot in re-learning how to cope with things such as mood swings and the voices that had become separate from me (which I later learned were called "multiples").

A bit about my past that fueled these disorders: My father was/is an abusive alcoholic. My mother died a sudden, painful death when I was 10 years old. I was often alone as a child after my mother died; my father would be gone for days at a time sometimes. I've been paying bills, taking care of a house, and raising myself since I was 11 (my dad was in deep depression). And at age 16, during the time period where I was attending counseling, I was raped by my best friend.

I realize I'm being pretty blunt and open, but on a site like this, I look at is as a counseling session. It's best to lay all your cards out on the table and let people see what you have. If you hide behind a poker face, you might miss connecting with people that you can identify with or that can even help you.

Anyway, I realize I'm rambling a bit. I tend to do that. So I'll end this post with the note of how refreshing it was to read about people being so open about a disorder such as Dissociate Identity Disorder. I've been misunderstood by people before when trying to explain it to them. I've been ridiculed and disbelieved, and it's disheartening, especially when sometimes they're people I was friends with. It was so nice to read posts about people with questions and worries, and read advice given to them by others with D.I.D, along with the signatures with all their multiples, including names and ages. It made me feel not so alone, to realize there's other people with D.I.D, and to see how open they're able to be on this site. Even if I end up to not be a huge participant in this site, I'm glad I joined.

And since I'm being so open and can't figure out how to do the signature thing at the bottom of a post yet, here's all of me:

~Cassandra, age 20, host.
~Kat, age 23, oldest multiple. Protector, defender. Slightly anti-social, blunt, untrusting, can be violent, sarcastic, stubborn, strong, self-reliant.
~Rain, age 22. Comforter, adviser. Supportive, determined, wise, thoughtful, strong, caring, selfless.
~L.C., age 16. Apathetic, depressive, shy, negative, uses self-harm to cope, sometimes suicidal.
~Cassie, age 8. Shy, playful, dislikes being alone, not very independent, is scared easily.
~Ray, age 10. Very shy, submissive, easily scared, very animalistic, dislikes loud noises, relies heavily on actions and noises to communicate. More dog-like than human, treated as the "pet" of the group. Appearance (to her)/how she sees herself: chin-length auburn hair, red/white dog ears, green eyes, human body, and red/white husky tail.
~"Hannibal", age unknown, real name unknown. Manipulative, cruel, self-destructive, violent,...

[ Continued ]

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