Its been two weeks since my last urge to kill. I feel like I'm on the road to recovery, and at the same time that people keep staring at me and secretly judging me. Must be withdrawals. Oh well, C'est La Vie.
We have found more evidence that we were raped even more, 15 times between the ages of 12-14. I don't personally remember a damn thing, but the evidence is there, and its damning. We went into the garage across the street where the old memories of rape took place and found our abusers old gardening gloves which he wore during. Fun stuff.
I seriously don't remember feeling anything but cold gloves on my hips. Thats it. Nothing more. And its uncomfortable. But I really don't care about it anymore. I really don't. This isn't the abused forgiving the abuser in some Oprah, awe-inspiring hypocritical #######4. I just have more important things to do than focus on being raped.
Anyhow, we think this is why Zack was so scared about having AIDS; not from our ex, but from our abuser, who were pretty damn sure never wore a condom. We don't have it, we have the American Red Cross to thank for that. Frankly, at this time, I'm just looking to either get laid or get a job I'll actually enjoy. Oh well. C'est la Vie.
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