Parties

Hey all,

So...I'm in a bit of a situation here, and kinda curious about other's opinions on how to deal with it.

I'm finishing my masters in about a month, and I'm also buying a house (which I'll have basically the day before my graduation). I mentioned my graduation to a few people, and some seem more excited about it than I do. My old boss really wants to "party". I mentioned it to a non-profit I work with too, and they want to go to the graduation and anything afterwards. I haven't mentioned it much to anyone in the lab, but my guess is if I did they'd want to go too. I'm also somewhat aware that there's a "housewarming party" thing that's also customary too..

So I'm kinda not sure what to do. Since I mentioned these things, it seems the people I mentioned it to immediately jump to the party idea. Personally, I don't find either event all that important. The only reason why I'm doing the ceremony is for my father.

I guess my question is, for similar events like this, have you ever tried hosting something? Would you if you were in my shoes? I know the two events are more about "me", but I'm not a very selfish person for the most part..so I'm also thinking about what they would want. if you would host something like this, how would you proceed?

If there's any friendships that you can leverage to assist with this one, now will be a good time to use them. Mom maybe?

A while ago i was in a similar situation and in desperation I approached a few party animals I knew and told them that i need to do this and they know how shy I am, can they come along just to blow life in the party if things get funny? I was amazed at how gracious they were in accepting to assist, and how well they saved potentially difficult moments without people even realizing it.

You've achieved lot and need to celebrate it. I say do it.

If things get akward on the night just open more booze, phone a few strippers and go to bed. You'll hear about the success of your party for months.

parties are to be avoided, as far as i'm concerned. nothing like a dose of social awkwardness to remind you that you really don't belong anywhere. not for me. in short, i'd duck these at all costs. i find i can handle only one person at a time. if there's two, excluding me, i quickly become surplus to requirements and might as well not be there. i had enough of this in my student days. i never intend to re-live the experience.

I didn't go to my own high school graduation, because I didn't see the point in spending a considerable amount of money for a few hours of agony. I had the same idea about my college graduation (except I didn't get to graduate). So I know I'm not really the most unbiased person to give any opinion on this.

But anyway, why not celebrate it exclusively with people that matter to you? No party plans or anything, just a small gathering of people eating and talking. If there are too many people who matter to you, then do it just with the ones who matter most. Just say you prefer a small-scale celebration. People should respect it, and I believe most people will.

anagram wrote:I didn't go to my own high school graduation, because I didn't see the point in spending a considerable amount of money for a few hours of agony. I had the same idea about my college graduation (except I didn't get to graduate). So I know I'm not really the most unbiased person to give any advice on this.

But anyway, why not celebrate it exclusively with people that matter to you? No party plans or anything, just a small gathering of people eating and talking. If there are too many people who matter to you, then do it just with the ones who matter most. Just say you prefer a small-scale celebration. People should respect it, and I believe most people will.

I agree! I think most people undertand and have no problem with someone saying that they're just not big on parties. If you do want to celebrate, or if there are a few that would really appreciate it, then I agree with anagram, just invite select few and go to dinner or something.

As far as housewarming, maybe you can split it up into 2 or 3 smaller parties. And it doens't have to be any big thing, just bar-b-que some burgers and provide beers, that always keeps the NT's happy, and you can just hang back and observe from a distance if you want!

I don't remember, did you say you don't drink? I used to not drink at all, but I have found that alcohol REALLY helps me socialize. Some might call that "self-medicating" but it's not like I drink very often, and I always end up drinking only as much as I intended to, so I see no problem with it. It definitely helps me handle parties though!!

Thanks for the opinions and all.

I tend to agree with the general consensus that having something small is not a problem. Maybe pick a few core people who would appreciate being invited and just invite them. The fact I don't have anything "big" isn't "bad", it's just my personal preference.

I also like the idea of "multiple housewarming parties". Probably good anyways, given the smaller groups are a lot different from each other...plus then it'd be between 2-3 people there, which I could handle.