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I am doing everything wrong for my parents!?

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I am doing everything wrong for my parents!?

Postby cureav » Sun Feb 05, 2012 8:33 am

Hello,
sorry if I have posted this in the wrong section, but haven't found any other family or parents forum.

My parents are getting me sick. Every big or little thing I do, cannot be good enough for them, they never see a good side of my work, only bad, so they could correct it and make them feel like a super-parent or just a better than I am. Sometimes these are very silly things, like yesterday, snow removal from the walkways in our courtyard; my father just had to get out a few moments later and do it his way, correcting my mistakes. Its the same thing with screwing a light bulb, or screwing a screw with a screwdriver, or million other stupid things. It seems to me like they are enjoying underestimate my actions so they can prove themselves how good they are.
Please people, don't tell me that these are all the parents like, or that I am stupid enough, cause I have 29. This is so devastating that I don't want to spend any time with them and work nothing. Please understand that it is not work that is hard, its them.
Can someone help me what kind of attitude should I take against them so I can support myself and make a boundaries so I never feel this low again.
Thank you all
cureav
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Re: I am doing everything wrong for my parents!?

Postby Greatexpectations » Sun Feb 05, 2012 12:42 pm

The undermining of your efforts is eroding your self esteem. You will not be able to change them, they are what they are, so you need to move away from your parents and find your own space.
My parents were like this.
I had a partner like this too. I could do nothing right, I would load the dish washer he would take the stuff out and redo it as I "had not done it correctly" I would clean the bathroom, he would redo it as (according to him) "It did not shine as much as when he did it" etc
My efforts were fine. He just compulsively put me down.
I left him with my self esteem shattered, it took me along time to build it up again.
I'm sure you are fine, and there is nothing wrong with your work.
You need your own space.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Lao Tzu
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Re: I am doing everything wrong for my parents!?

Postby cureav » Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:22 pm

Thank you Greatexpectations for reply,
you are wright about my own space, I'm working on that, making some long-term plans but the money and the job are the crucial issues. So, till then, I'm fighting for my space in these circumstances :?
Damn
Like you see, searching for psychological support
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Re: I am doing everything wrong for my parents!?

Postby masquerade » Fri Feb 17, 2012 4:43 pm

Have you considered therapy at all? It might help you to regain your sense of self esteem, and to process and deal with all the negative emotions caused by the abuse.
http://youtu.be/myyITD5LWo4

http://youtu.be/IaBLhoWTkMI

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