Verbal abuse by a stepkid

When I was 15 I started dating a guy who sexually and emotionally abused me. After 3 years I got rid of him and started dating another guy who was physically and verbally abusive. After 4 years with him I left him. I then dated a guy while I was in counseling for the past abuse and my counselor told me what this guys was doing was abuse emotionally. I left him after 6 months. I gave up on men until I met my husband. I have been with my husband for 11 years and he has a daughter from a previous marriage. His daughter was only 8 when we started dating. Throughout the past 11 years I have dealt with his daughter hating me. She lived with us full time and would see her mom on occassion when it was convenient for her mom. I have bent over backwards and treated her as if she was my own child. She would come to me crying because she always felt her mom was abondoning her or hated her. We have let her go live with her mom several times for her always to come crying back to our home.

She is now 1 month away from 18 and she has told me that our home is not our home that it is her dad and her home. I need to move out as nobody likes me everyone hates me. That I am psycho and crazy. I forced her dad to marry me when he didn't want to. Called me every name under the sun. Then just recently her dad caught her in several lies, stealing money from me, and he tried to discuss the issue and she told him to just kick her out. he told her then there is the door if you feel that way. She came out to a vehicle she was driving that I went to get some stuff out of and she followed me and punched me. I slapped her hand trying to defend myself and she went on a rampage callign me names again. My husband ended up calling the police for fear she was going to beat the crap out of me. He didn't get involved or stepping in because back in January he ended up getting a disorderly conduct charge from her. The cops came and were going to take both her and I to jail since I slapped her hand but since they know there is so much history in our home they slapped both of us with fines.

How do I get passed this abuse from her or handle it.

MagicOne, she sounds like a real handful. She might be learning how to treat people from her mother and since her mother put her through so much grief, she's taking it out on you. She needs professional help, you have to find out how you can get that for her. Maybe it's free where you live, or maybe there are special places where teenagers who have problems can get help.

jasmin
I believe you are correct that the stepdaughter is treating me kind of the way her mom is treating her. I am of course the easy target plus I have always been there for her and her mom has not. I would love to send her in to counseling but sd refuses to go to counseling. I am hoping that since she received a disorderly conduct maybe the state will listen to me and require stepdaughter to go to counseling kind of like on probation but I doubt it since she only has a fine to pay.

Try it anyway, maybe they'll listen. She probably will do something again, and you'll be able to get her to have counseling then, but be sure to protect yourself from her.