Emotional abuse from parents

Hi,
I'm sorry if this is in the wrong place etc, but there's been an issue that's been on my mind a lot lately, about the relationship I have with my parents, I'm estranged from my family and my therapist has said that they've been emotionally abuse towards me, maybe not intentionally, but because of how they were brought up themselves. But secretly I wonder that maybe I'm the one who's emotionally abusive. I'm manipulative, I've said horrible things with no provocation, and I've ruined everything for them. My brother and sister haven't had any struggles with mental health, it's just me. Which implies that I'm the problem. My parents are good people and they do their best. I'm just emotionally unstable and unreliable and selfish. I'm sorry I just needed to get that out... I just don't know what to do.

hiya..

nope, don't worry.. you're definitely in the right place..

I'm estranged from my family and my therapist has said that they've been emotionally abuse towards me, maybe not intentionally, but because of how they were brought up themselves. But secretly I wonder that maybe I'm the one who's emotionally abusive. I'm manipulative, I've said horrible things with no provocation, and I've ruined everything for them. My brother and sister haven't had any struggles with mental health, it's just me. Which implies that I'm the problem. My parents are good people and they do their best. I'm just emotionally unstable and unreliable and selfish. I'm sorry I just needed to get that out... I just don't know what to do.

^ just thinking outloud here.. have you asked your brother and sister if they suffer from any issues because of your parents..?
I know that my older sister was stunned a couple of years ago when i opened up to her and told her that i really struggle..

and if neither of them do suffer with any problems.. there will be a reason for that - although each child in the family is living in the same environment, they experience it as individuals..

as for ruining everything for them.. they're responsible for their own lives and choices... what did you do or say that you now feel really bad for..?
It's just that i can't think of anything that my own daughter could do to ruin my life.. she's a pain at times, she has a good go at being manipulative and she definitely tantrums at times.. but ultimately, she's my daughter and i forget these things two minutes later after i've told her off.. the main things that i remember are the softness of her skin or the mole on her foot.. the way her freckles darken in the summer.. how her laughter is infectious and how she always always always eats the last Oreo.. she's seriously clever but never remembers to put the wrapper in the bin..

would you talk to your therapist about these worries that you've been having..? it might be really useful to explore them a bit more..
i think that you were just a child with an opinion and no real coping mechanisms to help you display it properly.. xx