Is my friend being bullied? Mistress involved??

I don't know anything about psychology, but my friend may have a problem, and I would like to know if she has a “problem” before it gets more serious.

She says the Passive – Aggressive symptoms match her husband of 25 years.

They are still married, but she sleeps in a separate bedroom. They have not made love for many years, although they attend clan events together, where the husband will sit alone sometimes. He will not interact with family members he dislikes.

This is what she alleges about him:

When he is annoyed, he will not talk for days/weeks/months/years with close family members.

When he drops a soap bar on the shower floor, rather than pick it up, he will open a new bar. So, at times, there are a dozen still-good soap bars on the shower floor.

He threatened to hit the wife over a cash shortage checkbook problem, about two years ago.

He called his wife a “gold digger” even though she has an independent income stream. He owns a business.

When she was 8-months pregnant, she was still required to mow the lawn, until a neighbor started doing it, without being asked.

While she was caring for their 2-year old baby, he chased her around with a baseball bat.

She does not have a dishwasher even though they are very well to do.

He disappears for days, without notifying her. She only knows that he is gone because his toothbrush is missing. (Supposedly, he “went fishing”.)

He suggested that she move out to another island to be closer to her kids.

When the garbage is obviously full and overfilled, he will add additional garbage on top of it. She says that there are many more incidents like these.

In my lay person's view, she is either naïve of willfully-blind. The wife is very nice, compassionate, and caring to their two kids, who are now grown, and leaving/left their home.

What should she do, if anything?

You're her friend. What do you think?

I don't have any experience with this, so I'm looking for other views, as to what, if any, "disorder", the husband has.

I did say this: "In my lay person's view, she is either naïve of willfully-blind."

This is an Asian couple who are in large "clans".