Why did I go back?

I went back to my ex after three years of putting me down and making me feel less of a person. Right now he's back in my life and I care still but at the same time it's dragging me down. I tried to tell him I had feelings for someone else but he said he'd die if I left him. Whenever I'm with him he always brings up how depressed he is and never talks to me about any of my interests. I cry cause my heart is for someone else but he's constantly around me. I want to tell him it's over for good but anytime I want to tell him I feel frightened. The only thing he loves about me it seems is my body and constantly gropes me. Than when I say anything he says how mean I am and that I don't love him. Ugh... it's getting really frustrating and now my anxiety and depression is increasing. I don't feel safe around him, last night he said how he wanted to have a kid with me but I know that's so I never leave him. Now I'm freaking out.... please help. I need to feel strong.

If you are afraid, then you need to ask why.
The link below is to a site that has helped save thousands of lives. Take the risk assessment test in private. it will help you see the reality of the situation you are in-if you are in danger or not. There are also links there to places that can be of support.
https://www.mosaicmethod.com/
Be safe,
One