Hi there, first of all let me just say that I've read quite a few threads on here and my problem is not even close to most of them, so I do feel sort of out of place with my somewhat minor problem in comparison.
I'm having a problem trying to cope with my extremely abusive mother. She has been acting abusive over the past few years, but I've only started to need some support over the past few months. I'm 17 years old and have a 9 year old brother and a 20 year old sister living with me, along with my mother and father.
My parents have constantly been fighting over the past few years, but has reached its peak late last year and that peak has maintained throughout this year. It's been basically a game of "she promised this" "he said this and that" in my household between them and abuse between each other is a common occurrence. But anyways, that's beside the point.
Lately, my mum has been picking at all things small just to start an argument, she does it constantly. For example, she had been fine with me for a week or so, then yesterday I was on my way with my brother to a football game, we didn't have any form of transport to get there so I was just phoning around to see if anyone could give us a lift. As I was phoning around, my mum said "How are you going to the game?" to which I responded "At the moment, I don't have a clue".
Now for some reason, my response hit a nerve. She started shouting, cursing and throwing things at me (such as magazines, books and whatnot), worse of all, my brother was sitting down next to me so he copped the full grunt of the scathing attack too. Sadly, this happens extremely often, it seems as though if she asks a question and doesn't get the exact reply she wants, she just goes crazy. What I'm scared of is not for me, but the impact it will have on my brother. I don't want him to constantly hear these sorts of things coming out from what should be his role model. I can tell it is really affecting him as I have noticed a change in his attitude towards emotional situations recently.
Actually, my mum had just come into my room to abuse me once again, shouting about how I am disrespectful towards her, how my behaviour is shameful and so on, all this within possibly 30 minutes of writing this piece.
I'm just out of ideas as to what to do, my dad has tried to convince her to go to a marriage counsellor to get their relationship sorted out and also a doctor as he too is fearing the same things I am towards her behaviour, but mostly he just brushes her meltdowns aside as an everyday occurrence, so I believe it is my duty to keep my brother as far away from this as possible.
Another concern that I have is that my major, end of school exams are on as we speak, all this abuse I am receiving is detrimental to both my studies and my determination to succeed. There just isn't any drive anymore, it just seems everything I try to do is being ridiculed and end up just being abused for it.
Is there anyone who can recommend what to do in my situation? Currently I'm just trying to take both myself and my brother out of the house as much as possible, whether it be to a football game like yesterday or just out to the park. I just don't want him to be prone to such domestic violence at such a tender age.
Sincerely and thank you, J.