Hypersensitive

[SillySalmon]

I'm hypersensitive. It's driving me insane, I've been this way since I was a toddler.

Sniffling. Sneezing. Coughing. Laughing. Breathing. Snoring. Crashing, clacking, thumping. Clearing throats. Alarms. Sirens. Planes. Ringtones.

New underwear with scratchy waistbands. Underwear against my skin against jeans against a chair. Jean pockets touching my thighs. Tight bras. Scratchy collars. Bedsheets made from a rough material.

All strong cheeses. Any trace of their flavor. When my dishes and silverware have a "taste" to them.

Body odor. Sweat. Perfume. Cologne. Cheese. Certain foods.

Some things bother me more than others. Some are mild annoyances. Others are unbearable, to the point where I want to scream and rip out my hair. It's like the sound of nails on a chalkboard - only it's like this with so many things. No one can seem to understand how these little sensory annoyances can have such a strong effect on me, but they do. It's maddening and I hate it. I hate it, hate it, hate it. It makes stupid simple things that should be easy like going out in public or sharing a room with someone or wearing clothes almost impossible at times. I don't know how to get over this, I've been like this since I was a toddler. Sometimes I just want to be locked up naked in a dark little box, all by myself, no smells, no sniffling and coughing and sneezing, no clothes rubbing my skin. Sometimes I would rather just stay home than go out and face my senses.

[SillySalmon]

There is only one thing I've found to help, and it only works for sound - tallying. Every time I hear an annoying noise, I tally it. For some reason this calms me and keeps me from becoming agitated like I normally do. My sociology notebook is filled with tally marks all from one girl's cough (for some reason it's only her cough that bothers me), and even if she sits all the way at the back of the lecture hall, I can still hear it. And I have a notepad file full of backslashes for every time my roommate sniffles. It's the only thing that helps. I wish I could find something like that for smells, tastes, and sensations too, but I have yet to come up with anything.