How i overcame my social anxiety

I had severe conversation social anxiety and got made fun by people that i can't talk to anyone when i was a young. I didn't have any female friends. Simple friendly conversation was terrifying with men or women.

What changed everything is exposure. I used to be the biggest critic and hater of exposure and always bashed it in forums or groups. I always made the excuse i'm already doing exposure since i had to go to school and was outside alot already. What difference would more exposure do. Not until i actually tried it VERY DEEP did it put a light bulb in my head and had a big realization that i actually wasn't doing it DEEP ENOUGH and LONG ENOUGH.

I started small by doing thing like saying hi to people and small talks with cashiers. Majority of people are nice and talk back, you can tell people that don't want to speak by them having a reserved face expression. I then made a commitment to go outside for 2 hours per day to start small & short convos with strangers then build my way to longer convos. I went to places that were easy to start convos with strangers that was social acceptable and wouldn't look weird. Places such as parks, bus stops benches, bars, parties, train stations, restaurants, etc.

You have to start small then build your way up. It takes time doesn't work right away. You should see small results within 2 weeks of consistent practice within 1-3 month your conversation anxiety will be almost gone. I can now approach anyone and hold conversations very easy with strangers.

The reason why you're social anxiety isn't at the worst spectrum is because you've been doing a limited exposure your whole life by by needing to go to work, school, & hangout with family. These forced limited exposure is what's keeping your social anxiety from going crazy. If you expand these areas of limited exposure you will see more social freedom in your life.

thank you for telling this story. I have a 32 year old son who has it so bad he cant hold a job down and has no friends right now. he gets in and out of psych hospital floors but cant seem to know what he wants or can do. he is going to sign up for disability for schitzophrenia. he does have a psychiatrist and social worker too. he recently was put on a new med lexapro about a month ago but had a terrible reaction where he had leg tremors and cognition problems. It was hell for us to watch but we didnt put him in the hospital because he begged us not to and the doctor said he would take about 5 to 10 days for it to go away. well it did go away, we are so glad. i just wanted to tell you about his situation to let you know you're not alone. have a nice day!

Wow I take Lexapro for general anxiety and haven't had any of those issues, but if he's taking other stuff perhaps it's not playing nice with other things. I do sometimes think it has a dampening effect on my mind, but me not flying apart at the seams has been worth it (for now).

And the OP sounds like what little I know about ERP. I've had to do that with some of my OCD themes, deliberately not try to avoid certain intrusive thoughts or act upon them. Not quite the same thing, but I think the general principles are the same. Familiarity not only breeds contempt; it also breeds... not apathy, that's not quite the word I want, but mundane would perhaps be better. Exposure desensitizes a person.