Is having an Anxiety disorder a good reason to not consider

Is having an Anxiety disorder a good reason to not consider to myself a coward or pussy? I was picked on in middle school and high school pretty bad and really regret not standing up for myself back then. Im 41 years old now. Was not diagnosed with social anxiety disorder until around 25 years old so Im pretty darn sure my disorder is the main reason I could not stand up for myself. My symptoms in school were pretty bad. Trembling and shaking in class if I had to give a class presenatation. Or I would simply try to skip class to avoid doing it. Had few friends if any.


Didn't help my mindset any that my dad would call me a pussy and coward for not standing up for myself. Wasant an overall bad farther but on this particular issue he had no sympathy or understanding at all. Guess environment he was raised in you were expected to fight or it was the worst thing ever. Not that I think about it Anxiety disorders have a big genetic component so a lot of it can be blamed on the bad genetic hand he dealt me.


Anyway so I have accepted that with my disorder was the main reason I did not deal with these bullying issues better. Say 75 percent of it. But I still feel that last 25 percent is on me and my fault and that I am a coward. Having a pretty severe social anxiety disorder does not completely let me off the hook. Im sure there are some people who had as had or worse anxiety disorders were able to handle it better. Guess I look back on it now and im still dealing with a lot of guilt and self blame. Any thoughts and can anyone relate. Thank you

What do you wish you had done instead?

CityMouse wrote:What do you wish you had done instead?

Wish I would have punched them in the face. Perhaps then the bullying would have stopped. But who knows maybe it would have been worse. But would like to know how that alternate universe would have looked

Yes it is Anxiety can be absolutely crippling. Have you considered Asperger's Syndrome?

I have Autism and could not speak at all in class (it was classed as Selective Mutism in me it was so severe). In shops I'd write things down. I also had an extremely acute noise phobia and difficulty understanding people in busy environments.

When i quite by chance experienced an hearing loss in my teen years I was given hearing aids, I wouldn't wear them at first then relaised if I left them in but switched off they blocked even more sound. I was at college at the time and as part of the course we had to learn sign language level 1 and visited a deaf school, as soon as I saw everyone signing and not having to speak I was hooked. I spent the rest of my life functioning as a deaf person. If anyone spoke I pointed to my hearing aids and it was suddenly perfectly acceptable for me to write everything down if they couldn't sign.

Asperger's is now just diagnosed as been on the autistic spectrum, but it was considered a seperate condition and applied to more academically able people that still had the social difficulties of Autism. Part of that for people with an higher level of understanding is excessive anxiety about EVERYTHING! and it can completely shut a person down. It has nothing to do with being a 'wuss' or a 'coward' or anything else anyone wants to call you. It is in fact a neurological fault in the brain, an inability to process the world properly which makes everything seem terrifying.

It maybe worth looking into it. I'm sure there's some online tests for Asperger's syndrome (or Autistic spectrum tests) you could do first to give you an idea whether you could be, you would then need to take those results to your GP and ask for a referral for a confirmed diagnosis. The National Autistic Society may be able to point you to the relevant people in your area should you wish to go ahead with it.