Trouble with others

I'm 22 years old. Never had a girl, never had close friends except for one. My best friend that I know since I was child, he's gay but it is not a problem for me. Just that now my group of friends are at 90% gay.

Anyway I have always been socially dysfunctional; never had someone else who really care about me; or at least, I never felt to have a key role in a social group.

There is so much I want to say, but I'll try to be brief and cut to the chase. I'm "studying" a behaviour to adopt when I'm with others, in order to, at least, leaving a good mark on them.
So, talking with another one, seems like that being gentle and compliant, without show any kind of hard feelings, is the best strategy.
But I don't know, sometimes I'm so sad that I can explode but I can't talk about this with them; if they are annoying I can't tell them anything; I'm scared that they will take advantage from this, like if they can do or say anything they want just cause I won't move a finger.
The one said that sure i will have doubt about all this... but I have to be strong and keep going, 'cause anyway being rude or angry didn't bring me anywhere.

I can understand this, but still I don't feel so good on this. Mostly seems like they see me as a child, and girls don't seem interested in a gentle and good guy; looking like one of many whiteknight without bravery to fight problems and say his opinion if something is wrong.
Mostly I didn't want that all this will make me agressibe passive, stressed with much anger inside.

I'm 23 and struggle with social anxiety as well. I know what it's like to kind of feel like people treat you like a child because you don't really speak up for yourself, and it sucks. What I've learned over the years is that saying what's on your mind isn't about anyone else, it's about you. I'm still working on being able to say to people what I need to say, but you'd be surprised how many people are receptive. The thing is, you won't know until you try.

What are some things you've done to try and break out of your shell?

I drink alcohool, but then I become a big jerk.
Now I'm just trying to be kind, talking about minor things in general and say to the people what they want to hear.

Yeah, I tried the alcohol thing as well, it didn't go as planned.

I think being kind is a good start. I know when I'm talking with people I try to find a common interest we can both talk about and still have different things to say about it. People like having something to talk about, and they can't have something to talk about it everyone has the same ideas. So your different ideas are worth sharing, because they will further the conversation, that's how I see it. Sometimes it can feel impossible to really speak what's on your mind, but you'd be contributing in a good way, regardless of what you say.

I know for me what's helped me break out of my shell a little is telling people that I have issues breaking out of my shell. Sometimes that brings unwanted attention, but that's the whole point: sometimes you have to make yourself uncomfortable in order to change your behavior.

The problem is finding anything which talk about.
Or if you find it, will the others really interested? Many times I see people cutting a discussion, with any excuse, just 'cause they were not really interested.
Then, being timid is just a part of my problem. Mostly I hate being too much exposed, and this can be good, but also others can feel that I'm socially disfunctional.
Plus, inside i have so much sadness and anger, that sometimes take the control over me and so I can ruin a good night just 'cause i'm in a bad mood.