I feel like everyone is out get me

I'm 20 and I've been depressed for as long as I can remember. I'm in a hoarder house while my parents are off on vacation and I don't even know how to be happy anymore. I'm just an asshole to everyone and I'm ######6 made fun of by customers at work all the damn time. I ######6 hate myself and I don't know what to do at this point.

Dear Ted, I’m sorry to hear you are going through so much. Apart from feeling depressed, I got a feeling that you might have some deep anger within you too. But please correct me if I’m wrong. Just some gut feeling. Why do you feel the way you are feeling, that everyone is out to get you? Do you have any incident that you can quote so that we can discuss from that point? I know it’s hard but talking about it will help you process your emotions. So write more ok? Keeping you in my prayer. God bless!