Sex is like Running Down a Hill

When I have sex with my partners, I sometimes cannot climax and am not rational about stopping. Even when told, "No," I will push us to continue. This has created an unsafe environment for my partners, and I want to know how to be a better, more respectful partner. When I have sex I get so caught up in it that, as the subject says, is feels like I am running down a hill and I have no idea how to stop. This has been going on my whole life, I am now in my late forties, and it has tainted my relationships. How do I rebuild trust with my partners and move forward? Is there hope?

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

I have a problem with my partners and sexual coercion. When we have had sex, and they are done, or they don't want it at that time, I have coerced them into having sex with me. I become irrational during sex and cannot think clearly. Is there a way to repair these relationships and change the way I am during sex? My partners are willing and patient. I just don't know what steps to take past apologizing and validating their feelings. I am guilt ridden and carry an unhealthy amount of shame because of this.

Moved to an appropriate forum, and the second post seems integral to the subject at hand, so merged together.

In regards to the issue with achieving orgasm, do you perhaps have them lend a hand, so to speak, to finish, when they're done with wanting intercourse or other sexual activities?

They are fine with anything as far as that goes. The problem is that they feel objectified by my need to finish. We talked a lot, and it turns out that the feeling I have is a wave of emotion, not lust, that drives me and I connect emotionally through sex. Therefore, I am trying to connect emotionally in an unhealthy way that is unsafe for my partners.

But I take it they finish, yes?