hopeless

I am 23. I have no skills . I need a job. I have no real interests. I'm sure things like television and music don't matter since I don't delve into how they are made, I just like to stupidly stare at them. im contemplating suicide. I don't even know what I want. or if I want anything because if I did I'd be going after it. I can't form healthy relationships and I always become obsessive and obtrusive. I am a stalker, a lying manipulative pie9j of $#%^. I should have a car and my own place to live and be an adult and have a college education and I don't know how to get any of these things. Ive failed at every job I've managed to get so far.

Ok calm down , and don't do anything rash. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Instead of trying to leap across the river of life , lets start with small steps upon various stones.

First off, you are depressed (obviously) , and your lack of interests do not so much represent the real you , as it is a symptom of your illness. If you can , tell someone close about whats going on and attempt to see a doctor. They can help you , even in areas such as skills and social development.

Times are rough, its hard to find a job and the world often seems like its full of nothing but misery. But there is happiness , just waiting for you to approach it. I have a college degree and many years of experience in various skilled labor positions. But I work at a super market making as much as 15 year old kids. I get through by reminding myself it is only a way to kill time til something better comes along. Everyday you manage to survive is a testament to your strength. And that's all you have to do at the moment. Survive. Every passing day brings you closer to a future I know you can't see, but trust me, its there.

The first step you need to take is admitting you are sick and need help. Take positive action, work out , get out and enjoy nature, do something besides ruminate on the past. There is so much beauty in this world that you will never get to see if you end it all.

things wont get better. How can my life improve if I do the same thing and expect different results?

Don't do the same thing then. Mix it up. Is there anyway you could move to another location? A change of scenery can help a lot. Get out and meet new people. Learn from your past mistakes and apply what you have learned.
Things will get better. Surely you can remember a time when you didn't feel this way?