what happened

i used to be very into school and involved. but my whole life i was told i was a piece of $#%^ and all that from my moms boyfriend and he tells her that too. all she does is sit in bed all day or go out and do a bunch of drugs because her self esteem is so ######6 low from all that $#%^ . i always told myself i didn't believe him and what not but now ive realized i started quitting everything ive started because im afraid of failing. i have a feeling its going to be very hard to ever become succesful because i somehow let him get to me and my abusive ex boyfriend . i used to be so much better than this... what happened?

thank you so much, a lot of what you say makes sense and althought it's gonna take a lot of work i know im better than this. it's awesome hearing it from someone else too , thank you .

sure, idunno, keep working on this, persist, that's the most important advice anyone could give you


keep persist and you will impove your self esteem and with that the quality of your life


Do what you enjoy doing (not what others may seem to enjoy doing).


We have to talk about peristence too, because persisting is the best, but it has to be within limits, don't persist on everything you do, because it can be futule or even dangerous

beatachica wrote:

idunno wrote:i used to be very into school and involved. but my whole life i was told i was a piece of $#%^ and all that from my moms boyfriend and he tells her that too. all she does is sit in bed all day or go out and do a bunch of drugs because her self esteem is so ######6 low from all that $#%^ . i always told myself i didn't believe him and what not but now ive realized i started quitting everything ive started because im afraid of failing. i have a feeling its going to be very hard to ever become succesful because i somehow let him get to me and my abusive ex boyfriend . i used to be so much better than this... what happened?

$#%^ happened to you, thats what... and it totally sucks, big time


i wish i could bash both ur moms boyfriend and your exs head in, but ill do so verbally

such scum do not deserve to be in the presence of people like yourself and your mom

they have low self-esteem themselves and decide to turn their hatred outwards to those around them, they could cares less about the people around them and are completely self absorbed and selfish

you obviously left your abusive 'ex' since he's your exboyfriend, and thats the first major step in the right direction


if you find yourself in a situation with someone who is mistreating you, let them know "i didnt have a choice of how i was treated growing up, but i damn well have the choice now"


anyways, failing aint so bad, let's say, for the sake of whatever, that you try something and fail at it

well, now youve hit bottom, so guess what? you have nowhere else to go but up

after all, we ARE just human, and are bound to fail and make mistakes some time

but if you never try to begin with, you not only lose the chance to fail, but you also lose the chance to succeed

i hope you feel better, and if not, thats ok too

by the way, I love what beatachica said, keep it that way blessed girl!

Dear Idunno,

Hi, I am Destiny and I want to provide a litle food for thought here for you.

Becoming friends with yourself

A good way to build your self-esteem is to become your own best friend. This means talking to yourself in the same way that you would talk to your best friend. Imagine that your best friend came to you feeling upset about something - perhaps the way they look, how they went in an exam, something that a friend had said to them, etc.

How would you react? Would you have a go at them, and tell them how completely ugly and stupid they are, or what a loser they are? (hopefully not!)

Most probably you would listen to them, try to help them change their situation or look at it differently. And you'd try to convince them that they really are OK, even thought they may not feel good about themselves at the moment.

Now think about how you would treat yourself if you were in that situation. If your self-esteem is low you would probably give yourself a hard time. In fact, you are likely to be much harder on yourself than you would be on your friend. Isn't it strange that we often have completely different standards for ourselves than we do for other people? Imagine what would happen if you treated yourself like you would a best friend. How would things be different?

To start with you would probably be much kinder and fairer on yourself. You would see yourself in a balanced way, and you wouldn't focus on and exaggerate your perceived flaws. If you made mistakes you would forgive yourself without putting yourself down. If someone treated you badly you would stick up for yourself, and not tell yourself that there must be something wrong with you. You would also spend more time encouraging yourself, and accept that you are not perfect, but that neither is anyone else.

If you can work on you and realize that the people that called you names and belittle you were wrong then your on the road to building your self esteem.

((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))