Not sure if I have schizotypal personality disorder

My therapist recently suggested that I might have schizotypal personality disorder but I'm not really sure. I had a schizoid like episode back in 2003 but I thought it was because I was smoking alot of pot and trying to do supernatural practices. All my life I've had this feeling that external situations have some kind of cosmic signifigance and as soon as I feel I'm getting some kind of a message I feel compelled to self destruct or do whatever the message is telling me I need to do which usually always relates to an external situation that I feel I need to change or get out of. I always thought that I was borderline psychic and "special" and know one knew what I know, but now I'm starting to question if it's real or not. I feel or have felt that I can read peoples thoughts by observing certain actions they do and I'm very paranoid if I get the thought in my head that certain people are conspiring against me. If someone tells me my thinking is irrational I will dismiss it because I'm convinced that I have some kind of special intuition that they don't. I don't know if I have it or what I have but I'm confused and lost and don't know what to do. I also have ocd and bdd and I think i'm avoidant as well so i'ts hard to tell what's what.

Your therapist who talks to you face to face would know the best about what you are facing, so I would go with him/her. If you ask for my opinion as a lay patient who only knows of these disorders through reading bits of encyclopedias and internet articles, then yes, your symptoms do sound fantasy/delusion like which are said to be common amongst schizophrenic/schizoid/schizotypal patients.

What's BDD? I'm not familiar with it, but it sounds like you just want an answer about what's going on with you. With some of the things that you mentioned, I can relate to-- I want to constantly change things or get out of certain situations.. but maybe this isn't so strange. This might not be the same for you.. but I think everything outside myself is strange and relate it to myself as being strange
because I can't relate myself to being part of the rest of humanity.

Maybe you want to change things or get out because you find it self-destructive to you? I'm not a therapist by any means, but I don't think that's always negative. Ask yourself: Do you find what you want to escape from as something negative or destructive? Or are you so unhappy with your current situation that you would do anything to not be a part of it? A lot of the time I know what I don't want that it keeps me from achieving things that are beneficial to me.

That's all for now. I'm tired. The therapist I see says she does see some signs of Schizotypal Personality (which I have been diagnosed with by a psychiatrist about 6 years ago), but thinks it's something that should be observed over time rather than listing off certain symptoms found in a book. I guess this keeps me not so focused on whether I have a disorder or not.. and shifting that focus on what needs some work.[/b]

Bdd is body dysmorphic disorder. I'm really trying to get some kind of an idea of what is going on with me but I feel like no one seems to understand. I think a big part of my problem is my social ineptness and feeling like i'm the most socially inept person I've ever met, when I do try to socialize I feel like what I'm saying doesn't make any sense to the other person and they just kind of look at me puzzled by what I said, I think because I'm so afraid of being ridiculed.I do feel like my current situation is somewhat unhealthy for me but I really have no other option at the moment. I have a tendency to do very self destructive things to my life in order to try to break free from whatever it is that I'm suffering with hoping that it will somehow lead me in the right direction, usually it's centered around my social ineptness and my social anxiety, I somehow feel that if I get myself into a new situation then that will help my social anxiety or my feelings of being trapped. I'm not sure if that made any sense but...

Hmm.. Ok, I am a little familiar with Bdd. I understand the feeling of of having something wrong with body, but I'm glad that no one looks the same as I do. There have been times I haven't felt 'right' in my skin, but am pretty certain I don't have Bdd. It's not a major issue for me anyways.

A lot of the time what I want to say doesn't come out the way I want it to.. And I have the worst timing for when I want to talk about something with others. Maybe people don't react in the most desirable way to you. Don't think of it as your own personal issue. Maybe the other person isn't treating you with respect. I feel very awkward interacting with other people a lot of the time.

What you said did make sense to me. You probably have more options then you realize. It sounds like you've identified what is causing you the most stress-- having this feeling of being socially inept. I don't know if changing your situation would be more beneficial than changing how you perceive the situation. My boyfriend has reminded me several times that the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

I'm somebody who does have Schizotypal Personality Disorder. StPD for short. To me it seems strange how there looks like there is more help for us who have this debilitating disorder in Europe than in the United States. I'm an American and quite honestly I'm disgusted at our society on how they would go about dealing with with people who have this condition. I can accept that I do have this condition but I can't accept that I can't get the help I need. I don't like getting looked at out of the corner of their eyes or having their eyes rolled at me as somebody who is just making excuses. For all sense and purposes on the surface I appear to be a normal person, but lately my situation has been decompensating a lot worse then I had thought. I have been fired from one job and am about to be fired from another because I forget things, usually little dumb stupid things.
Anyway, StPD and BDD, my take on it in my experience, because I have been living with STPD since I was diagnosed with it in 1987 is that we do (I say we as those of us who do have StPD) is that we do have these ideations of things that might look like BDD but I don't think it's quite acute enough to be classified as BDD. Everybody's case is all their own so your results may vary. I have been able to walk in both worlds, many of us who do have StPD may be able to tell just by the way I talk that I have StPD.
I talk a lot in analogies, cliches and use bizarre over-inflated words that sound important but are really not. As a person with StPD, we connect like that. I refer a lot of times to the normal person as "the Norms" I can be acceptant of that. I don't often share in pleasures that most norms enjoy. Stuff like sports, I could care less but am proned to enjoy things more like science fiction and fantasy stuff like Harry Potter, Star Trek and Star Wars. I'm a lot more receptive to it than norms are. I'm 40 years old and people feel it's "Childish" for me to like that stuff. But is it really? I try to get help but the healthcare system is the United States is circling the toilet very quickly.
Though I'm somebody who has no desire to hurt anyone, of late I am wondering a lot of things. A big "buzz" word if you will that affects us is "Decompensation" it means to deteriorate. I'm more worried about myself. I do not want to be anyone's problem either. Now think about this, schizotypal, schizoid and schizophrenia come under the schizophrenic spectrum and each prognosis is it's own it's also important to note that there are overlappages with Asperger's syndrome, and it should behoove you to find out and learn the differences, because Asperger's comes under the the Autistic spectrum.