My friend shows signs, please someone tell me what to do

Hello,

I've been to this website before, under a different name, and it really helped me then with my own problems. But now I'm back, because my friend is showing signs of schizophrenia. I would do anything to help them, but sometimes I just don't know what to do. Any advice from people with the disorder or just anyone would mean so much to me right now. I am currently studying Psychology at college, which is what alerted me to the fact that she may have the disorder, but obviously that means nothing when it comes to real world problems.

She's told me that as a child she had major problems with it, felt like everyone was reading her thoughts, and when she saw bad things on TV, she thought it was her fault and she had done it. She wasn't too specific though. When I met her nearly two years ago she was absolutely fine. We went through a year and a half together, we got really close, and never in a million years would I have guessed she had been through something like that. Then recently she told me all this about her childhood, and since that day she seems to be getting worse. Like remembering it and worrying about it is making it happen.

Sometimes she'll be sat with me normal, and then suddenly she'll go really quiet. She says her head is heavy and she responds to things with nodding or shaking, like she cant really hear me. I hold her hand and I talk to her about anything that comes into my head, because I don't know what else to do... is there anything I can do, when she is like this? Is there anything at all that would help?

Sometimes she'll get giddy and she'll say things that don't really make sense, like she's replying to something that wasn't said. She says she can hear things, telling her to kill herself. I try and keep her distracted, and say thats crazy, of course she shouldn't, but she keeps saying they have a point, that they argue. I tell her, whatever they say is stupid, you have just as much of a right to live than anyone, but it doesn't seem to help. What can I do? What would she want me to say? It gets so bad sometimes that she cries, and says she doesn't want to live, and it breaks my heart. I feel really, really helpless. Later when she is her "normal self" she'll tell me she doesnt feel like that, but at the time, its just horrible

Her parents do not know, and nor do the teachers at our college. I don't really want to get teachers involved because of the god awful experience I had with them, and I know she'll tell her parents when she's ready (if ever) and I would never push for more than that. Her boyfriend knows, and he's a good friend of mine, so I know he'll help her too. Right now, I want to take her to a GP (uk) to get proffesional advice. I know right now she is not diagnosable because she doesn't show the signs for more than a short period of time, but everything I know and every instinct tells me to help her and get her to a GP. Any advice on how to talk to her about this would help so much as well, as she cried last time I mentioned it and I felt awful. I dont want her to feel crazy, or to worry, because I know that will make her worse. Self forfilling prophecy, and all that.

I know I've just kind of appeared out of the blue asking for help, and haven't introduced myself, but I'm only just getting steady on my own feet when this happened. Please, any help and support would be so welcome right now. I'm sick of sitting there clasping onto her hand and talking out of my arse just to try and keep her distracted, I want to help, make things better for her. She has everything infront of her, and she's such a wonderful person, I would never forgive myself if this got worse when I could have done something.

Thankyou thankyou thankyou in advance

Bear

Hi, Mysterious Bear! Maybe you could bring up the doctor visit when she is calm and happy, when she's not very stressed. Do you think she'd listen? You could make an appointment for her and keep telling her it's going to get better and that the doctor will help. You could try to comfort her with that.
It really is the best thing and they will hopefully send her to a specialist.

Hey Mysterious Bear, sounds like you're an amazing friend. Speaking as someone with family members who have mental health problems, it's lovely to hear that you are there for your friend when her family don't know/can't help with her problems. Sounds to me like you're doing all of the right things by being with her and encouraging her to get help. Maybe you could talk to her boyfriend and see if together you can find a way to get her to have the help that she needs? Obviously, I don't know what her parents will think about it all, but it sounds as if it wouldn't be a completely new topic to them if she experienced problems when she was younger. Could you go on her behalf to some student advice at your college and speak anonymously about your friend? Maybe they can suggest a way. As a parent myself, thanks for looking after your friend. Mental health problems aren't always easy to spot and if your child lives away at college great friends make a real difference. You'll find a way to get her to the doctors, just don't give up.