Could Really Use Some Opinions, please!

My boyfriend seems schizophrenic. I've read a lot about mental illness since I was little [I actually don't know why, I've just always been interested] and he really seems to fit most of the criteria.
He refuses to see someone who can diagnose him properly and will allow only me to help him and be there for him [we've been together and very close for a long time]. I had EDNOS and I know how hard it is to come out and tell people what you need so I need some honest help here.
Obviously I'm NO expert, and I really need some second opinions and I have some questions for those who have dealt with this problem or at least a similar one.

Okay, so the part that confuses me the most is that almost every one of his problems fits into Schizophrenia, but he confided to me a while back that he blacks out and will wake up much later, usually with things in the room moved around or something near him different than it had been before. A lot of the time he won't actually black out, but there will often be a lot of lost time throughout his day that he can't recall. There are at least 6 different voices in his head, 1 of which is ridiculously meek and nice and another which is, well, quite the opposite from what I've heard. I can actually tell when my boyfriend is "different" most of the time.

Here's my main question: Would this automatically be some case of MPD? Or can these sorts of things still fall under Schizophrenia? Because I know they are 2 distinct disorders.

He's been addicted to self mutilation for the longest time, his family used to give him so much crap for being "depressed", he's really violent [not really to me though], and his family has a history of mental illness.

Another question: If I were to get him to go to a therapist and honestly explain all of his issues with them, is there any way at all that they can have him admitted against his will?

Also, can anybody give me any advice on how to help? I'll never quit trying to convince him of getting help, but I don't want to just stand by because he says no.







Thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this!


- Krista

Hey,

Im sorry but I'm going to have to reply with some questions and comments of my own, before answering yours. Firstly, why hasnt' he already been to see a doctor by his family? Also, I strongly think that he's exaggerating things. I honestly believe this to be the case, and I don't suggest you hyping up anything that he says about this. One more: How violent - and to whom/what - is he?

Kevin

have you considered dual identity or ptsd ?

What your boyfriend claims to be experiencing are dissociative fugues. However, I'm not sure what you mean by "there are at least 6 voices in his head"? Do you mean that he acts and speaks differently toward you and others at different times (you mention that you can tell when he is different), or that he actually hears an independent voice speaking to him that he does not experience as belonging to him? Do the voices criticize him or give him commands? Is the violence you mention the result of following these commands?

Does he have any bizarre beliefs or experiences, delusions, or paranoia? Does he suffer from hallucinations?

If you are in the United States, from what I know he could not be held against his will unless he was an immediate suicide or homicide risk. Otherwise, his family or someone would have to begin commitment proceedings in court. Not sure about this, but I think this is true to the best of my knowledge.

I apologize for all the questions. I would suggest that you get him to seek help if you can do so safely.

--Peter

Frankly I think it's unfair of him to unload his sickness upon you and make you his shrink. So what if it's hard for him to go to a shrink? Life is hard, and he should assume responsibility, not weigh upon others.

Thank you for all the replies. Sometimes I feel like he is overexaggerating sometimes, but honestly I would rather give him the benefit of the doubt and realize that hes been lying the whole time than wrongly accuse him of being fake& find out he's telling me the truth, you know?

I have seen him sound and act differently, but he says other times they're there in his head and I don't even notice it.
He says he feels too dumb to identify them with names but that they're all different, in personality, attiitude, voice, etc.
From what he's confided in me, they criticize him, yell at him, tell him what to do, and even make him paranoid about being with me.

He used to be so paranoid that he always had 3 knives on him when he left his house [his parents took them away before he turned 18; now he wants a gun license]. He's paranoid about everything but often becomes arrogant [so much so that i find him unattractive when i think about it].

His violence is not a direct result of the voices if they are there - its sort of just who he is, ever since I met him. He used to fight at a dojo and was actually .. Number 1? I believe, in our state, at a tournament thing. He hates a lot of people, talks with no guilt about hurting and even killing people [he's never actually TRIED, so I honestly can't say that this isn't just him talking]. He thinks its funny when people get hurt [other than me, he pretty much babies me to $#%^ usually]. He has gotten into a lot of fights, though, and doesn't care who it is unless its me.
I spent a lot of time confiding really personal things about myself with him before he even began to open up with me, and still there are things that he won't talk about to me. I think thats the only reason he's even nice to me in that respect, otherwise I would just be like everyone else.

Sometimes he'll think he sees something that isn't there, and a lot of the time thinks there is something bad in him that he needs to cut out. He's got 3 or 4 areas on his body he won't stop picking at because he thinks there's something under there.

Well, in my opinion he seems to be verging on paranoid schizophrenia. It develops in young adulthood so chances are that it will get worse unless controlled by medication. This could be a dangerous situation for you if he becomes violent because of his paranoid delusions. You should realize that this is beyond what you signed up for as his girlfriend and either get him help, or get yourself out of the situation. I don't know if you've talked to him about getting help, but keep in mind that he could become violent if he believes you are somehow conspiring against him.

I've known a (nonviolent) paranoid schizophrenic person before, and when they decompensate it can be scary. He will listen and believe his delusions and not you. I would encourange you to think about why you are with him in the first place, also. But above all realize that he needs medical attention that you can't provide. You may feel guilty but you need to think about yourself and your own health and well-being.

Please keep in mind that I don't know you or him so have no way to tell what is really going on, and I am not a mental health professional, just a guy who reads a lot and has first and second hand experience with mental problems. But this is clearly the beginning of schizophrenia with paranoid character.

Good luck to you and I'm sorry you're in this situation.

--Peter

Oh, I'm sorry I made my last post without rereading, but I see that you've tried to get him to help himself. If he won't, you should get yourself out of this situation and/or convince others (such as his family) that he needs help. If you feel you are strong enough to stand by him, you will want a support network so that you are not dealing with it alone. You might want to see a doctor or shrink for advice. They will know what people can do in this situation.

I didn't mean to advocate for the abandonment of the mentally ill--I was thinking about your safety in light of the fact that he's violent and delusional.

--Peter

oh no I totally understand where you're coming from
I just read a lot too and have considered following a career somewhere in the field of psychology, its always interested me and I've talked to a lot of different kinds of people and I honestly feel like if somebody has a problem, that shouldn't be the reason someone else leaves them. I've had problems of my own before and it sucks to have people just be like "peace" when they see whats wrong. I've thought long and hard about my boyfriend and I'd like to stand by him as much as I can [and hopefully he's not #######4 me].
I just really wondered what it could be because some articles I've read say that DID and Schizophrenia are completely unrelated and others talk about how badly the symptoms overlap.. so I wasn't sure if someone could have separate personalities and still have most of the characteristics of Schizophrenia. Because if you can't, then I know right away that he's been lying to me.