What the schizophrenia

I don’t know anything about what the voices want. I think no one does. They come to us in many forms and tell us many things. Why? They don’t want us to know how absent of life they are. Do they need us (power and control) most abusers do. They are scared you will find something that will make your life happy without them. Or they want you to depend on them, they want you to see them as the only option. I say don’t depend on them, they will want you to do this or else. I’ve learnd that they are bullies and abusers for some. They want you to pay attention to them so they can bring up memories or and you can focus on their behavior. That’s the worst when they want you to focus on them bringing you down either with your past or with their own concoction of ideals of yourself. They know what you to think because you think of it (whatever It is) when they are around. I notice that they only know information of when it started when they first came in, they don’t know anything else before it started. What are they though, no one cares, if you tell anyone without the condition they say they do not know, even if they do they can’t deal with them. To tell you what I know is that family of mine (well what I believe to be family at the time came in and try to help me) I later found out they know nothing about what happened. I called them late one night to ask them the family I thought that came in how they were doing and how their husband was doing they told me their husband was sleep (the one who was helping me fight the voices). So they were never helping me they were sleep. At the time I was only dealing with 2-3 voices but when others came in about 5 more the voices that I said were helping me disappeared the husband that was sleep. And now I have about 10 voices in my head now. Other times they would imitate voices to a Tee. I think we all have flaws my biggest flaw is not speaking up. I was and am still a little afraid to talk about my condition with other except with my therapist. These voices cant exist without distrust in people I feel that’s their strategy to get you to distrust people. What do you do then is speak as much as you can to friends and family you don’t even have to evolve the voices just speak to your friends and family let them know you” yes you” want them to be apart of their lives. You don’t need the voices keep speaking what’s on your mind without thinking about the voices. Hang out with out as many friends and family as you can till it ends or you pass. Don’t stop talking use your voice.

What do the voices mean to me. So many people say they are your brain malfunctioning or they are aliens, demons, real people, or just bad energy. I say who cares I don’t want them. Some even believe they are magic or occult powers people use on each other to curse them. Wow, what the heck. What did I do about it, I tried my best to beat them whatever they are I want to live life happily. What am I doing now is listening to music all types. What helps me when I am not listening to music is breathing which is what I learnd when the voices talked to me, remember don’t think you are weak and that you have to use this exercise of breathing to calm down. Just remember to breath in and out deeply this helps with your nerves a therapist once told me. So many times I felt that I was being weak when I tried this. Its ok to look weak in front of them, its your mind. Also don’t let them size you up be that child who calls on god or the one who goes to your most trusted friend or family to talk. It may not work all the time at least you are not talking to the voices who discourage you in life.

What I learned is that the voices can condition you like Ivan Pavlov dogs which drool when they see food. Every time you hear them say something they got you. I feel like you have to undo the conditioning. At the beginning you never react so powerfully to the voices until your family and friend are involved or the police and government. The voices need this power they don’t actually have it until you give it to them. I feel that’s all that it is, we give them this power. We need to let go of what we gave them and creat something new. Keep up with your family and therapist and your forums or groups you are apart of. Its only a problem if you make it yours alone. With someone else you can determine what you need to do. Right now its me with my therapist. If you want to reply feel free. That’s all I have to say right know.

I'm glad that you're sharing things with your therapist, at least- I think it must be hard from most people to understand what it must be like to hear these voices- I know I don't. But I do have disturbing intrusive thoughts and I've had to make myself understand that these thoughts that tell me I'll do this or that, are not me. And can't make me do anything I don't want to do.