Guilt over lack of attachment

I really would, but their so focused on their view that the way I am is wrong and that I should be more like everyone else of my age that trying to tell them anything else would be a waste of time and would just lead to long lectures on how disapointing I am.

Rachel,
If you haven't already done so, you might want to try getting to know the people at the very top of the social hierarchy. They don't need your company any more than you need theirs, so you can relate to them as equals.

ryl wrote:Rachel,
If you haven't already done so, you might want to try getting to know the people at the very top of the social hierarchy. They don't need your company any more than you need theirs, so you can relate to them as equals.

Well, that would solve the guilt problem, yes. Unfortunately I have nothing in common with them. They find me very odd and I find some of them pretty irritating...

I'm actually pretty happy in the niche I'm in now. I can sit and stare much of the time and people usually understand that I just need space, as they're not the kind to want to talk ALL THE TIME themselves. I don't feel so fake lately.

racheH wrote:Well, that would solve the guilt problem, yes. Unfortunately I have nothing in common with them.

Let's see...you have no fear of abandonment, you have the upper hand in relationships, you're particular about what parties you go to, you like gossip, you have people you don't care about sucking up to you and telling you what a great friend you are while you wonder if you should break it to them that you're not really their friend...nope, nothing in common at all!

racheH wrote:They find me very odd and I find some of them pretty irritating...

That's too bad. Maybe it's different with guys, but I've found the jerks to be the ones in the middle who felt the need to step on other people to maintain their position. Sometimes this behavior extended into the upper ranks but I could always get along with at least the head honcho.

ryl wrote:

racheH wrote:Well, that would solve the guilt problem, yes. Unfortunately I have nothing in common with them.

Let's see...you have no fear of abandonment, you have the upper hand in relationships, you're particular about what parties you go to, you like gossip, you have people you don't care about sucking up to you and telling you what a great friend you are while you wonder if you should break it to them that you're not really their friend...nope, nothing in common at all!.

I mean nothing to talk about. Different interests, different outlook, different sense of humour, different taste in... everything. And they talk about boys waaay too much for me. I get on with most of them OK. It's just that I know from overhearing their conversations, I wouldn't get anything positive from being a part of that. Just more tiring intrusion on my thoughts. That's not in a snobby way - I know they'd feel the same about me (except for the intrusion thing - most of them are pretty extraverted and don't seem to get that problem).

I agree though, many of the most popular people are actually the easiest to approach and get along with.