Blank Expression and "fitting in"

I used to think I always just had a blank expression. People would constantly tell me to smile, which was annoying. I've been told I always had an angry look on my face especially by my sister who'd also tell me to smile. I could never understand why everyone else can look regular and not smile like they just won Miss America yet I couldn't and was told to smile. I guess at first I didn't notice the middle ground in it. After awhile though of hearing that so many times I conciously thought about my facial expressions and actually noticed or at least felt they were different from me being alone by myself to being at school or where other people were. My face always went sour once I was placed into a social setting, so I actually did look mad. I never noticed I did that and where I didn't actually look normal, but had an angry expression. (It made sense, usually I wasn't too happy about having to be around people, but I still never did it on purpose.) After awhile, since I did notice it, it's changed. I haven't been told to smile hardly ever anymore and I will usually smile at anyone who I look at or if I notice someone looking at me. I used to frown if I was uncomfortable in a situation, now all I do is keep a half smile on my face. It actually works out a lot better.

mikebw wrote:A few guys in Security(Where I pick up my work keys) say "Quiet down! You talk to much." or "Stop talking!".

Those comments are used a lot with me and it's one of the ones I can't stand the most. It's like they are joking, but I don't see how it's funny at all. I just kind of nod anytime people say this, but I don't usually even know how to respond to a comment like this. I mean I get it, I'm quiet, it's not like you have to make a joke about it to try and tell me I am. It's something I already know. I've never heard someone go up to someone that talks a lot saying "Oh my, your so quiet" or "Geez, talk some more". It's almost like going up to someone with blonde hair and saying their hair is just so dark and black. It makes no sense and just seems stupid.

Other than that I've had pretty much all kinds of comments, that seem to be said over and over. I don't see why people are compelled to say certain phrases that are so popular, because if you've heard it once, you don't need to hear it again.

People have told me to smile, they've told me I should talk more, they've made jokes about it like up there, one person once asked me if I could count all the friends I have on one hand, and proceeded to tell me how I should start just talking to people randomly, because then I'd make friends. That time was on a school bus and I was a senior at the time. I told the boy that I didn't think so and really there'd be no point since I wouldn't stay friends with any that I made anyway. He made some comment that I can't really remember now, but the comment made me think he thought I meant that I thought I'd lose them or that they wouldn't want to be friends with me after I made them or something, but I actually just simply meant that once I graduated I wouldn't keep in contact with anyone I talked to from school, so it would be wasted time when I didn't care to make any friends anyway and I wouldn't keep any of them.

People have made a few jokes about the silent types, but not often and I don't think they really even would anymore. I'm not positive on how people always really percieve me, but what my idea is that they see me as just a very shy, quiet girl who wouldn't mean any harm. I'm overall really polite, I say thank you if it calls for it and all that stuff. I think since I even smile more, especially when people look at me, that I seem even more of the "nice shy girl". I don't look like a stern person, I am a girl, and I think I probably more or less look like a cheerful quiet keeps to herself girl that it would almost be laughable to imagine me as someone to shoot up anything. During the beginning of highschool with one of my friends, which was when I was told to smile the most, he told me his first impression of me was that I hated everyone, so he was a little scared to talk to me. By my senior year, he always told me I must never ben depressed and anyone who had talked to me would always comment how they've never seen me mad and so I must happy all the time.

Hhhmmm, I never seemed to have taken up the occupation of a serial killer in other people's eyes. The worst I've been labeled was a misanthrope. I actually do maintain some slight facial expression, so the other person won't feel uncomfortable around me (although lately I'm not feeling like doing it anymore). This does relieve some possible discomfort and steer the other person away from classifying you as a stereotypical psychopatic loner, although I still freak people out from time to time.

St3ve wrote:I'm in college and I was in my English class when all of a sudden my teacher leaves with 4 other students into another room for the whole class time. So, of course, while everyone else had nothing to do they started chatting with one another. It's a relatively small class, only 15 of us and they all seemed to get to know one another and became friends. I just sat there drawing and trying to figure out if any work needed to be done for other classes because theat's what I pay 22,000 a year in tuition for. So a girl who has said hi to my in the past trying to be nice I guess, yelled across the room "Steve, Steve!" I didn't hear her until she said it like 4 times because I was into what I was doing. By then the whole room went quiet and was staring at me so I said "Hey" then she said "How are you?" I'm thinking what the ###$ is going on. Then I said "Alright" and went back to drawing. How pointless was that? I hate that class.

Utterly pointless. I know that I would be completely clueless as to how to answer such a ridiculous question (given the situation) so as to not embaress that girl and keep other peoples' minds off you. I suppose you just initiated a short-termed discussion among the people in the classroom (which will lead to longer lasting consequences) on how much of a nutcase you are in their eyes. Luckily for me, people in my study group seem to be more reserved, so I won't have to endure such a situation (probably).

I'm not schizoid, but you think you guys have it bad. All my life I've been picked on and ridiculed for making too many expressions. Not that I care at all, I thought it was funny. People were (and are) really bothered by it.

I notice that when I walk around in any crowd of people, it seems to me that most people are mostly expressionless, save for the occasional fake, vapid 'smile' -- in other words, showing the teeth in an unnatural, unattractive way -- which, I assume, is to give the appearance of being 'happy' and 'carefree'. I'd personally rather see people expressionless and without those smiles than with them.

As for me, my expressions caused me to have to caricature myself eventually.