Being Schizoid and your safety person

Hello Guys,

Just a question. Have any of you had a safety person that you cherished and you talk a lot to them about interesting stuff and they listen and answer, but it is hard to talk to them sometimes because the things you talk about in terms of your interests are the humanities or academia or any other topics (schizoids are known to be introspective and have maladaptive daydreaming and fantasizing)? When you do talk about humanities or any other interests, they simply shut you down or emotionally cut you off. Then when you try to salvage the relationship, they become more argumentative and blame you as the person who is argumentative. Then they threaten to abandon you. Then when you try to seek external help, you are further humiliated by that outside help. So you just shut down emotionally and due to the anxiety ruminate about the negative impacts.

Has that ever happened to any schizoid? What happens if the safety person is no longer reliable? Should the schizoid only talk about simpler concrete stuff or topics like housekeeping or chores to avoid this safety person emotionally if the schizoid is living in the same house with them?

Being a safety person who's acting socially negative is contradictory in itself. If so it would be the end of the safe relationship to that person, maybe worse the end of the relationship at all, depending how deep trust was destroyed. I'm used to say: "I don't bear grudges, but I never forget". Once I had a safety person, but who never let me down.

orinoco wrote:Being a safety person who's acting socially negative is contradictory in itself. If so it would be the end of the safe relationship to that person, maybe worse the end of the relationship at all, depending how deep trust was destroyed. I'm used to say: "I don't bear grudges, but I never forget". Once I had a safety person, but who never let me down.

What if the safety person represents familiarity and was once kind and still supports you, even though sometimes they can be difficult? I heard that Schizoids have a hard time disengaging from their safety person because that is all they have ever known, despite their safety person being sometimes difficult. Like for example, what if you had a parent you trusted and they were the only person you know because schizoids tend to be sheltered and don't know anyone and they fear strangers and other outsiders, but the parent has all the leverage in the relationship? What if the schizoid fears losing their safety person because they are afraid of what is out in the world? What if the schizoid fears losing their safety person, because they are afraid of the outside world and the dangers inherent in the outside world?