SPD problem of Love made hungry

Fairbairn and Guntrip are only really de facto "experts" in SPD because ...really no one has given much effort or had much opportunity to study it probably since they published, and it's a bit of a shame because they really come from from the dark ages of psychology when people were just kind of projecting and guessing. I mean, this stuff basically came out of Freud's quackery, and, while certainly interesting to read, this object relational psychoanalysis has basically been discredited because of it's groundlessness, and because it's a poor fit given additional information from biopsychological advancement.

Smirks:
Considering the track record, I think we'll be talking the same about biopsychology next.

EmpathySucks, I don't think we will. Do you have a reason that you are skeptical of biopsychology?

I meant to come back to this since it fits with the theme of my comment in the other thread

there's been a fairly drastic shift in the meaning (or connotations?) of 'schizoid' over the course of that term's life. even if the psychoanalytic tradition were perfectly valid, early/mid 20th century psychoanalysts were writing about a somewhat different category of people than those who would now be diagnosed with schizoid personality disorder (consider that there was no AvPD in the DSM prior to 1980)

that's likely to make searching the past century's literature for insights about any individual schizoid person rather misleading, as well as facilitating more semantic muddiness from contemporary analysts

Thank you so much for your inputs guys

UnfortunateEvents, iabsurdlyexist, sakura1, emillionth, anathegram
It was very nice talking to you people.

@anathegram One day, you will understand that I was not romanticizing
"would you consider looking for a new one? the one you've got sounds extremely dubious to me" That was so caring of you to advice me in this way. Love you

@emillionth
"I'm not sure what I could say that wouldn't make you feel worse, but I hope you'll take better care of yourself in the future" Thank you for saying this.. I got really anxious after getting negative feedback but this calmed me down.

You all were blunt at first, but you were very caring.
@ sakura1 <3 I loved your plain way of putting things. But that comment "Kinky fan fiction" hahaha (Can I kill you for that )

Wish you all the best in life. Thank you once again.

emptylife90 wrote:One day, you will understand that I was not romanticizing

feel I should address this as I may not have done a good job of explaining what I meant

in a few of your posts you mentioned things like schizoids in particular having greater insight, being capable of more intense passion, etc

those things may be true of a particular individual who has an SPD diagnosis but I don't think you can work the opposite way

anathegram wrote:in a few of your posts you mentioned things like schizoids in particular having greater insight, being capable of more intense passion, etc
those things may be true of a particular individual who has an SPD diagnosis but I don't think you can work the opposite way

Well, it is difference of perspective. You can just see the seed, and I can see the tree and flowers in the seed. You are saying it is impossible such a little seed cannot contain such big tree. Obviously, as far as facts are concerned, you will win the argument You can cut the seed and show me that see it is possible there is no tree, not even a single leaf. Seeds are of no value, they are dead. There is no sign of life. Logic always cut things up. You dissect someone's head and heart, you will not find love, all you will find is mess of nerves, veins and blood and other unpleasant thing.

Only a person whose soul will be drawn towards you will able to see your infinite potential. Only love can take you beyond your head and its logic. No matter what the science says it cannot defeat the trust born out of love. Love has no memory,it has nothing to do with head, it is not dependent on the image of person, it is just there, it cannot be sacred away by pain or death. It will go on nourishing the seed till the last breath even if it knows that the seed will take eternity to sprout.

And one devote his/her entire life in loving because if the essence of seed has filled your life with so much beauty, naturally you would like that essence to grow and spread itself.

anathegram wrote:schizoids in particular having greater insight, being capable of more intense passion

You mistook me. I only meant that the passion lie dormant in their being, sleeping like uncoiled snake. My husband presence feel like black hole to other people. Many a times, people left his company (even when he used to sit silently in the corner, doing nothing ) saying that they don't like his presence, he seems to suck their energy. But I was attracted to same emptiness of his being even emptiness has beauty only if you have sensitivity to see it. And I am not exaggerating a bit or idealizing or something, trust me, whenever I was with him in the same room, I used get something like mild orgasm which was not like getting desperate or filled with lustful, but as if all my thoughts have stopped, and present moment is all there, bright and clear. I have felt this same magnetism of being even when he was more of an asexual and an-hedonistic.

So if you see from my eyes, for me my husband is intense while the guys who try to be a macho man or alpha male in bed are dead. I think this happen because the libido of a SPD is concentrated in sex center while in other PDs and normies, it is invaded by ego. Sex energy is abused and becomes a tool to gratify ego for normies and manifest itself in sentimentality and useless drama. Even if there are barriers that does not allow a SPD to come in contact with his sexual energy, these barriers work as boon and protect their purity. That's what I meant by intensity. Sexual energy may be in complete dormant state but still it is not dissipated, which is a big thing. That's why, unlike narcs or normies, they don't break down by other's disapproval as all their energy is rooted solely into their being. I don't know if I am making sense or not

We are brainwashed media and stupid literature that passion is to have uncontrollable desire for the woman's body and BDSM #######4.That is just ugly lust and violence which usually result from repressions. To me passion is purity, it has nothing to do with sexual drive, sentimentality and emotions. And I think you will too agree on this with me that a schizoid cannot fake- neither sexual desire nor emotions. SPD wouldn't have to exist, If they could have learned to fake it. Have you wondered why cannot you fake it? I think it is because your sexual energy is totally uncorrupt. It is in its pristine state. You fail to use it to gratify your ego because there is not much ego at first place.

You have no idea how attractive is that for someone who is going mad for something real, even if it is emptiness, even if it means no sex, no emotions, no intimacy.

unconditional love...amen.

WichitaLineman wrote: unconditional love...amen.

That sounds very much to me like it falls under the category of "careful what you wish for".