Afraid Of People

I see people are horrifying, wolves in sheep's clothing who are a huge threat to my sense of self worth.

I have fantasies of people making racist comments. A white girl from high school was talking about my privates being "too dark." The worst part was that she came back and expressed guilt, which I thought was even more racist because she really *does* think hers are superior and that I don't stand a chance of being equal.

I will never measure up to people's expectations of me. I will never be good enough. I feel like I'm stalked by control freaks to want to make me something I'm not. I like myself.

I will be silent for a week. For example, people might ask me why I don't have children and I have yet to come up with a good answer, so I will just shrug.

Can anyone relate?

I don't have fantasies at all but i think you can't avoid getting hurt from people.
That everyone is going to hurt you and are selfish.
So you can't get attach or have feelings if you want to not get hurt.

I do feel i will never be good enough.but i don't feel everyone is control freak.just that the majority doesn't match with me.

That acting so you can belong makes me shrug too,finding good answers.

sakura1 wrote:I don't have fantasies at all but i think you can't avoid getting hurt from people.
That everyone is going to hurt you and are selfish.
So you can't get attach or have feelings if you want to not get hurt.

Good advice. Very Zen. Thanks.

I wasn't telling it as advice but as fact.lol.also because you asked if anyone related.
I think some people just don't mind getting hurt as much as others.

I can see it from the point of view that others try to take advantage of you if they know your faults or try to put you down to make them feel better about themselves. You have to be confident in the traits you do have and understand that there are certain things that just won't be as good as others. The latter half is more difficult to figure out because those are the things you keep failing at but perhaps keep trying to make better. Your positive traits should be apparent.

I guess another difficult thing is positive traits that people treat as negative traits. You know, silly things like honesty, loyalty, dependability and optimism. Nobody wants to be taken advantage of because they are too nice.

iabsurdlyexist wrote:I can see it from the point of view that others try to take advantage of you if they know your faults or try to put you down to make them feel better about themselves.

Why me though? Why do they seem to single *me* out for bullying?

CityMouse wrote:Why me though? Why do they seem to single *me* out for bullying?

They probably don't:

sakura1 wrote:I think some people just don't mind getting hurt as much as others.

Or at least they probably don't single you out at first. But frustrated people looking to feel like they have power over something/someone will tend to aim their attacks at who/where they can see that it actually hurts, so it's a vicious circle.

CityMouse wrote:

iabsurdlyexist wrote:I can see it from the point of view that others try to take advantage of you if they know your faults or try to put you down to make them feel better about themselves.

Why me though? Why do they seem to single *me* out for bullying?

A lot of times it's because you embody traits that the bully sees in him/herself that they are ashamed of.

CityMouse wrote:I feel like I'm stalked by control freaks to want to make me something I'm not. I like myself.

...especially if you carry those traits proudly. Let your freak flag fly. ###$ 'em.

CityMouse wrote:I have fantasies of people making racist comments. A white girl from high school was talking about my privates being "too dark." The worst part was that she came back and expressed guilt, which I thought was even more racist because she really *does* think hers are superior and that I don't stand a chance of being equal.

Was this white girl in high school making comments a fantasy?

Doesn't matter. It's been my experience that caucasians are the worst at sex.

CityMouse wrote:For example, people might ask me why I don't have children and I have yet to come up with a good answer..

Try saying "I try all the time but they keep coming out wrong."

CityMouse wrote:Why me though? Why do they seem to single *me* out for bullying?

If we could easily figure out why people are jerks and provide resources to help them, things would be a lot better. Then again, maybe jerks are an evolutionary need.

iabsurdlyexist wrote:If we could easily figure out why people are jerks and provide resources to help them, things would be a lot better. Then again, maybe jerks are an evolutionary need.