Have you always been isolated

Have you always isolated yourself, is it something that has gotten worse or better as you have gotten older? Have you always preferred your own company or are there some people you have always enjoyed being around?

I feel more avoidant than schizoid but as long as i can remember myself i was introverted. But at times i get more social and at times asocial.
I always wanted to be alone at some point but there were times that i got very social .
I remember as as a kid not seeing the point in getting out then i became more social at 15 but after 18 even more but now i don't see the point in going out again.
But suddenly i can become social and the next minute feeling the opposite. But as general image i avoid most people now.
Sometimes i feel like i want 2 opposite things at the same time but asocial wins over.
Some people make me feel better than others when i am around them.but not the majority feels like i am acting.
Sorry i am not schizoid and i am answering but i get very introverted at times /or i avoid people to the point the world feels like is only for extraverted people.
With some people it feels more fun to be around .
But every place seems boring also.where would i go when everything seems more boring than home.

I've always had the tendency to isolate myself. Things have gotten much better as I've gotten older as I've realized that this thing called SPD exists and that I have it. So now, I understand myself much better than before.

I wouldn't say that I would automatically choose isolation over having someone to give me some company (at times). I kind of let people find me. If I'm ok with them, then I'll let them hang around me (at least somewhat). I definitely prefer independent activities. I would rather have others around in spurts. I much prefer one-on-one situations (in general).

There is definitely a pickiness involved as to who I would prefer to hang around me. But this isn't usually a problem since I give off vibes of being aloof and uninterested in those around me. It's just me being truthful really. It's kind of like "I'm not really interested in you (at face value), but prove to me why I should be" sort of thing. A lot of people are afraid to approach me (especially women) in any kind of social way since I put off this cold, aloofness. So despite being a good-looking guy, my cold, aloofness will tend to make an outgoing woman shy. I can completely understand this. It's very much my SPD in play here.

I think my personal tendencies (regarding boredom and solitude) never really changed, and what has changed over the years are the possibilities, brought both by "growing up" and by the available technologies of the time. I've instinctively preferred solitude for as long as it has been an option, even when it felt like there was something wrong with being by myself, or when it simply wasn't an option.

My current interests are actually pretty much the same as the ones I had before I got sick with that illness that makes you believe that finding a mate (and, well, mating) is actually something important. When I was a kid, I wanted to watch TV and play video games, and I liked to learn about ancient or far away places. Today, I want to watch TV and play video games, and I like to learn about ancient or far away places. I feel like I'm mostly cured from that chronic illness.

^this is one of the reasons i don't feel schizoid.
I can't get over my need to fall in love.it makes life less boring when you think of someone.but at the same time i can't fall in love.

sakura1 wrote:^this is one of the reasons i don't feel schizoid.
I can't get over my need to fall in love.it makes life less boring when you think of someone.but at the same time i can't fall in love.

You should try falling into love with yourself. The more you love yourself, the better it gets. It makes the need for falling into love with others of less importance (not that I'm saying you can't fall in love with someone else without loving yourself...just an observation). Anyway, just some "food for thought".

I Dream 5 wrote:

sakura1 wrote:^this is one of the reasons i don't feel schizoid.
I can't get over my need to fall in love.it makes life less boring when you think of someone.but at the same time i can't fall in love.

You should try falling into love with yourself. The more you love yourself, the better it gets. It makes the need for falling into love with others of less importance (not that I'm saying you can't fall in love with someone else without loving yourself...just an observation). Anyway, just some "food for thought".

Is this typical for people with SPD? I would have thought it more of a NPD phenomenon.

ZombieZ wrote:

I Dream 5 wrote:

sakura1 wrote:^this is one of the reasons i don't feel schizoid.
I can't get over my need to fall in love.it makes life less boring when you think of someone.but at the same time i can't fall in love.

You should try falling into love with yourself. The more you love yourself, the better it gets. It makes the need for falling into love with others of less importance (not that I'm saying you can't fall in love with someone else without loving yourself...just an observation). Anyway, just some "food for thought".

Is this typical for people with SPD? I would have thought it more of a NPD phenomenon.

Those of us on the severe end of the spectrum of Schizoid Personality Disorder are very much in love with ourselves. As for NPD, I can't speak for that. That's another subject area that I can't speak for (other than mere observations). Someone with NPD would have to explain how they feel about self-love.

I would say that the difference is that SPD is on the positive side of self-love. The NPD would fall under the darker, negative side of self-love.

But how do i do that. As introverted i do enjoy being with myself more than with others,i wish i had someone like myself lol
But it doesn't give me the high i have when i want someone else. Why.how can i feel that only with myself. I don't know. Plus is more fun as idea to touch someone else too xD
I can't make life interesting with the thought that i have noone to be in love with.how can i do it xD

-- Sat Jul 21, 2018 9:29 pm --

I can do it ,i think if i find a passion for something. Not a person but something. But i don't seem to be able to find that either.to be obsessed with a passion of something

I was definitely more sociable when I was younger. Also, angrier.