Antipsychotics

naps wrote:Sometimes I think the purpose of medicine and psychiatry has become all about the monetary gain of it's practitioners. People are desperate to 'fix' themselves, and the industry has become flooded with people who can't see the ethics behind the dollar signs. Politicians are like that as well. And merchants. It's pretty much become the guiding principle behind capitalism.

I try not to be bothered too much by such things. It helps me to stick to environments where the good people are more likely to be encountered.

naps wrote:

ZonedOut wrote:..I've chosen to live with instead of fighting against my issues. Embrace your possibilities, accept your limitations. Focus on what you still can, instead of relentlessly sticking to goals you've apparently turned out not to be destined to.

Worth repeating. I wonder how many people live a life of frustration trying to achieve some lofty goal based on words some self-help guru con artist spits out from behind a podium?

Oh, I actually feared I was starting to sound too self-help guru-ish myself...

Still not sure what to do. I think I could benefit from a low dose of antipsychotics in some way, making everything just a bit less intense to me. But I don't want to feel better at the expense of either my physical health or the actual qualities that come with my hypersensitivity as well. Also, just the idea of being dependent on meds again gruels me. Part of me just doesn't want to go down pharma route anymore.

ZonedOut wrote:

naps wrote:Sometimes I think the purpose of medicine and psychiatry has become all about the monetary gain of it's practitioners. People are desperate to 'fix' themselves, and the industry has become flooded with people who can't see the ethics behind the dollar signs. Politicians are like that as well. And merchants. It's pretty much become the guiding principle behind capitalism.

I try not to be bothered too much by such things. It helps me to stick to environments where the good people are more likely to be encountered.

I should try that.

Still not sure what to do. I think I could benefit from a low dose of antipsychotics in some way, making everything just a bit less intense to me. But I don't want to feel better at the expense of either my physical health or the actual qualities that come with my hypersensitivity as well. Also, just the idea of being dependent on meds again gruels me. Part of me just doesn't want to go down pharma route anymore.

Try it. Like I said, everybody's different. A little that dampening effect might be just what you need
Plus giving advice on medications here is on par with diagnosing people. You can't and you shouldn't.

I would guess dependence would be lower with a small dose. Plus, from what I understand SSRI's and antipsychotics can he stopped quickly, without tapering off. But again, don't take my word for it.

Do you still take your ADD meds? I wonder how they might affect the side effects of antipsychotics.

Yeah, I think I'm gonna ask my psychiatrist for it next week. Everything just seems about to get too much for me at this point. I'm feeling overwhelmed all the time. Even having to think about what I should eat for my next meal can overwhelm me. I just don't know. I can't make choices anymore. Because everything overwhelms me at this point, I retract more and more from everything. I can do hardly anything. I could well spend hours a day just staring, while I actually want to increase my activity.

I've always felt sane, in control over my mental health, but lately, I start to feel I'm no longer able to control it by myself. It all just happens to me and I feel unable to do anything about it. Also treatment is starting to feel weird. I just can't explain what I'm going through, and so they don't seem to understand. I'm losing touch. I fail to communicate, and they fail to understand me and to make some treatment plan. So yeah, that is maybe partially my own fault, but I don't know how to change it. My psychiatrist actually wants to start an all-new psychodiagnostic evaluation, but that freaks me out, so I refused. It's well-meant I guess, but I just can't have that at this point.

naps wrote:Try it. Like I said, everybody's different. A little that dampening effect might be just what you need

Yeah, unless it makes me even more like a vegetable. But my theory is that by helping me not being overwhelmed so easily it may actually improve my ability to get myself activated, as well as my cognition.

naps wrote:I would guess dependence would be lower with a small dose. Plus, from what I understand SSRI's and antipsychotics can he stopped quickly, without tapering off. But again, don't take my word for it.

As antipsychotics dampen everything, they may be hard to come off, especially after sustained treatment, as everything will come back in at full intensity all that sudden, something you will no longer be used to. But as far as I know, they don't cause a direct withdrawal syndrome, other than what I think can be seen as a rebound of symptoms. It's a different story for SSRI's. It's often said that SSRI's may be even harder to come off compared to benzo's. Discontinuation of SSRI's often comes with a characteristic withdrawal syndrome, one of the most notable symptoms being described as ''brain zaps'', which can be quite disturbing.

naps wrote:Do you still take your ADD meds? I wonder how they might affect the side effects of antipsychotics.

No, I quit my ADD meds months ago. They ended up being no longer effective at whatever dose, and they started to cause more and more side-effects and paradoxical reactions. I promised myself to never go down the route of stimulants again, neither with nor without antipsychotics. I do have valid reasons for that.

I changed my mind. I think antipsychotics will do me more harm than good in the end, especially if taken long term. I think for me, it's more constructive to explore together with my case manager and psychiatrist what is actually happening, to find ways to prevent it from happening and to look for ways or develop new skills to deal with it once it happens. I better ask for that than a prescription for antipsychotics. Besides, it's worth asking what to do if I feel in need of help right as it happens, because I tend to avoid help when I feel worst and need it most, which I shouldn't. I wonder what happens if I could have my therapist over to see me right when I'm decompensating. It sure would be hell to me, but it may well worth the pain in case it will result in more understanding of what's happening, I suppose.

At this point, I'm wondering whether I shouldn't touch any antipsychotic at all, or whether I should ask for a short trial just to get to know how I respond, how it feels to me, for the mere sake of exploration of the issue itself.

ZonedOut wrote:I changed my mind. I think antipsychotics will do me more harm than good in the end, especially if taken long term. I think for me, it's more constructive to explore together with my case manager and psychiatrist what is actually happening, to find ways to prevent it from happening and to look for ways or develop new skills to deal with it once it happens. I better ask for that than a prescription for antipsychotics.

Right. Those drugs are just band-aids. The underlying problems are still there, and all you're left with are the side effects.

Besides, it's worth asking what to do if I feel in need of help right as it happens, because I tend to avoid help when I feel worst and need it most, which I shouldn't. I wonder what happens if I could have my therapist over to see me right when I'm decompensating. It sure would be hell to me, but it may well worth the pain in case it will result in more understanding of what's happening, I suppose.

Yes! When I'm melting down, the last thing I need I to put on a coat and enter the outside world. I've called mental health hotlines on a few of these occasions, but they always ask "Are you thinking of hurting yourself?", which makes me think if I'm not suicidal or a danger otherwise, they don't want to talk to me. The rest of their "advice" is always lukewarm, textbook pedestrian crap.

During periods in which I've been in therapy, it's pretty uncanny how I'm never at my worst when it's time for an appointment. I've even tried to mimic (or summon) being in a bad state by getting high or drinking too much coffee beforehand, but it never works.

When I'm having an episode, I would welcome a visit from my doctor/therapist. They wouldn't even have to take off their shoes before entering. I think the panic and ballistic pain of these moments supersedes any desire to remain remote and withdrawn. My whole character seems to change.

When I was having more hypomania like symptoms they tried to put me on anti psychotics. Mostly they made me sleepy and didn't help much. Then again I did not experience the same issues like you have represented. I found a mood stabilizer that helped me more than anything along with depression medication. I would definitely think it would be worth while to discuss it with a psychiatrist. If they do decide to put you on a med and it doesn't work don't be discouraged. Sometimes it take awhile to find the right medication.