How to tell my mother

Lobo wrote:I usesd to just shut my door to block the world out, but she took it off it's hinges so that I could not "hide in your little hole"

So use the bathroom/toilet instead, and lock yourself in there,
reading, listening to music, or whatever. Don't let your mother in
even when she needs to use it. She will undoubtedly become
quite distressed about that, and criticise you, so just tell her that
you're have no other choice, as there's nowhere else where you
can find some privacy.

Hi, Lobo,
Here is a link to an introverts forum. There are plenty of books and articles on introversion which hopefully you will be able to get your mother to read. At least this material will benefit you.
Having to indure a bonehead extrovert parent is a bummer; I hope she can be made to see the light. If you got counselling to deal with her constant unwarrented pressure and lack of acceptance of your basic personality, that might help you cope until you come of age and can leave home.
You are certainly welcome here just as you are. We are all kindred spirits.

http://hiddengiftsoftheintrovertedchild ... /index.php

Extroverts, in my experience, tend to be simplistic and closed minded. I don't think any one of them can understand SPD, but they can understand introversion, which in extreme form seems to be schizoidism. Try printing this out
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extroversion
and highlighting the parts about physical brain differences and anything that puts extroverts in a bad light, such as the tendency to think as they talk rather than think before speaking. Tell her that the part of the brain that understands that not all humans are the same must not be getting much blood flow.
I assume there are no males living in the house, but if there are get him or them to help with the missing door. Is your sister a possible ally?

Lobo wrote:Again I got the lecture asking me why I could not act like a “normal human being”. I get the distinct impression that she is comparing me to my extroverted sister whose life goal seems to be to have fun and find a husband so that she can be Suzy Homemaker. I also got the lecture about how there is nothing wrong with me and I should stop trying to make myself different from everyone else.

Tell her that you are not trying to be different, that it's just the way you are and that (this will be mighty evil, could be dangerous to use) if she really loved you, she'd accept you as you are. Good luck.

My problem is very similar, only I haven't told my mother yet. I anticipate a less extreme, but equally disapproving reaction. She was an athlete and social at my age, and though I've hinted that I grow tired at even the prospect of going out somewhere to see people, she tells me to "get over it" and says that I have to learn to stand up. I respect you for even being able to tell your mother.

I don't know how to help you....just...disappear...

Don't run away, don't move out, just be gone and gone for good. No drama. No conflict. No confrontation. No nothing.

I wish I could alleviate existence from our shattered race. Nothing can save us, nothing.

my mum has even started ringing my old friends trying to get me out
i could never tell her, im 18 now and i have no qualifications and am looking for a nice job where i don't have to talk to anyone so i can move out.

maybe you should do this as well (easier said than done)

Let's not forget that however annoying mothers can be, they can
also be useful: for instance, they can prepare meals for you and
wash your clothes.

Lobo wrote:I even tried telling her that I was schizoid. I showed her the criteria for a schizoid and when she read it she laughed and told me that it described me perfectly, so I told her that I thought that I was schizoid. She immediately shut down and got angry at me, as if she was taking it as a personal insult that her own child could think there was something wrong with herself.

Third_Eye_Seed wrote:My mother took it as an insult as well when I showed her the criteria. I honestly don't know why I bothered. Poor choice on my end.

Seriously, there seems to be some pattern with schizoid people who have an extroverted parent. I showed my mom the wiki about spd about a year ago and she got annoyed at me for even suggesting it. It was a waste of time to bother myself with something like that. My advice(although obviously not universal): don't try convincing extroverted parents to accept your isolated lifestyle and just endure the hardships, eventually he/she will give up (worked in my case).

Reading the responses in this thread makes me realize how good it is to have an introvert parent. My father never bothers me about getting friends, going out, blah, blah, blah. Nor does my mother, who is an extrovert, she just assumes I take after my father more. Though she does think we both are a little bit odd for wanting to be by ourselves so much.