The good, without the bad and the ugly

slimsally wrote:I write a lot of fiction (some published, but I'm still a huge nobody). My tendency to daydream constantly helps me create worlds and characters for my stories. Sometimes I will write a story about a fantasy I have just to get it out of my head because it has been circling around for months.

my therapist always tells me that i should write my fantasys down or paint them, but iam realy bad in expressing me. bad with words, with paint or music.

Necrionos wrote:

slimsally wrote:I write a lot of fiction (some published, but I'm still a huge nobody). My tendency to daydream constantly helps me create worlds and characters for my stories. Sometimes I will write a story about a fantasy I have just to get it out of my head because it has been circling around for months.

my therapist always tells me that i should write my fantasys down or paint them, but iam realy bad in expressing me. bad with words, with paint or music.

Maybe you could try other forms of expression. Give a few things a try and don’t worry about not being good at it. Everything takes practice. You just need to find something you enjoy.

I feel the outward expression helps. It keeps me from daydreaming so much, although I can’t seem to help doing it the vast majority of my time.

the bad and the ugly is what makes it intersting
just the good is boring

madjoe wrote:the bad and the ugly is what makes it intersting
just the good is boring

It's not like we never hear about the bad and the ugly. Too often it seems like the bad and the ugly get worn by some like a schizoid badge of honor.

Reynolds wrote:

madjoe wrote:the bad and the ugly is what makes it intersting
just the good is boring

It's not like we never hear about the bad and the ugly. Too often it seems like the bad and the ugly get worn by some like a schizoid badge of honor.

True!

You can not have one without the other. It is like the ying to the tang, or the light vs. dark.

Let's hear it for the good for once, we all need it from time to time. I do not see a problem.

Runestone wrote:

Reynolds wrote:

madjoe wrote:the bad and the ugly is what makes it intersting
just the good is boring

It's not like we never hear about the bad and the ugly. Too often it seems like the bad and the ugly get worn by some like a schizoid badge of honor.

True!

You can not have one without the other. It is like the ying to the tang, or the light vs. dark.

Let's hear it for the good for once, we all need it from time to time. I do not see a problem.

As a retired senior citizen schizoid who was not diagnosed until late in life I would like to hold up a ray of hope that we can do as well as we can as schizoids if we can learn to work within our nature to do as well as we can. There's no need for an "I want to go out in the backyard and eat dirt" attitude about being schizoid. Life is no bowl of cherries for many, many "normal" people either.

Here's a real biggie "good" for schizoids: being able to be alone. So many, many people cannot deal with that at all because we hear all the time about how very lonely they are. They need people so badly and need to be around them so badly that being alone destroys their quality of life. It seems like they cannot even work alone either. They so lonely that they want to die.

But as schizoids, that is our wheelhouse, our strong suit. We are not only able to just cope with being alone, we want and need that solitude even as the "normal" world tries to convince us that we should be miserable being alone and that we would be happier being like them. But we are not like them and most of us don't want to be like them which is why there are many undiagnosed schizoids--because they are content with being who they are. We must learn to appreciate and cultivate our strong traits as schizoids. And the ability to be contentedly alone is one of them.

Well, you don't have to worry about impressing anyone. You can just be yourself since you aren't worried about trying to make friends or anything.

Here are some others:

*Independence from others...which equals little drama
*You don't have to compromise with others (outside of work)
*Great observational skills and the ability to get a read on others' personalities
*Great ability to fantasize and create your own World separate from the external World
*There is an ability to see the social world for what it is and to see through status, fame, etc., basically, seeing the social world in a very down-to-earth way (by understanding the dynamics that create certain things in the social world)

I guess I could go on and on...but these are some things that come to mind. I will also say that not everyone who is Schizoid is going to have all of these positive characteristics with equal strength. Some of these traits may not be as strong as others, etc. Again, I go back to my own theory on the severity of SPD determining how strong these characteristics are.

I Dream 5 wrote: I will also say that not everyone who is Schizoid is going to have all of these positive characteristics with equal strength. Some of these traits may not be as strong as others, etc. Again, I go back to my own theory on the severity of SPD determining how strong these characteristics are.

I think that schizoids share some very basic traits but that there is a wide spectrum of SPD and no 2 of us are exactly alike. We are not all the same bricks in the wall but vary from one to the other.
Often our greatest strengths are weaknesses to others. And too often we allow ourselves to be convinced by the others that we should not be happy or even content since we are not like them.

For me, I really only see the good in it.

I'm able to happily able to be "alone". For example, I've taken many vacations by myself. People around me sometimes see it as sad, but for me it is happiness. When I was a child I didn't really care if someone liked me or not. If people didn't want to play with me, I was fine with that and did my own thing. I had a teacher point that out one time to my parents and my mom asked if she should be concerned about it. Teacher said no, they wouldn't have to worry about peer pressure as much as others would because I was content being by myself/would be less likely to cave in to peer pressure.

I'm able to have different viewpoints from others, sometimes it makes me the black sheep. Again, not something I care about. I stick to my guns and hold my ground. I'm not going to change what I feel is right just to appeal to particular person/people.

In short, it makes me okay with being different. Like others have stated, you can be fine with just being you and you can see things as they really are.

When I was a child I didn't really care if someone liked me or not. If people didn't want to play with me, I was fine with that and did my own thing.

As a kid and a young man I had many friends but it took me 40 years until I only recently realized that I was not really best friends with any of them but that I would just go with whoever was available at the time. Now most of the guys I grew up with got married within 2 years from the time I was about 22 to 24 and when I thought back upon that time it occurred to me that I went to many weddings but nobody ever asked me to be in their wedding, not even as an usher. It never bothered me at the time, but I had never really given it a thought.

Unlike many who seem to have been a stone cold schizoid from an early age, I really grew into it and became a full fledged schizoid. Nature and nurture and experience was like a paint on me that took years to dry until one day it colored me schizoid but it happened so gradually that I wasn't aware that I had crossed any line. But when I am around people, which really never is for long, I wear a cloak that hides my true schizoid color and nature and simply shed it when I am alone so that when with "normals" I am able to hide in plain sight. My "personality disorder" has evolved into being my personal super power.