Sigh

Most of the time I think I'm fine; then a day like today comes along. I was awakened out of bed bright and early by a phone call: I had a job interview, but only if I rolled out of bed and was there, meeting new people within an hour because they had no other times available. I dove out of bed and rushed there, muddled through fine, although the experience stressed me out majorly. After that, I drove 50 miles in the opposite direction for a previously planned day of socialization with some family I hadn't seen in a while.

I get home after subjecting myself to others all day, and all I want is to be alone and there's OF COURSE a houseful of people. I have the option of leaving my room and socializing with them, or being trapped in here all night and them thinking I'm a complete weirdo. But I don't care to know these people and I know it's wrong of me to get angry at my family for having a social life, but just because THEY'VE made four new friends today doesn't mean I want to. It's only 4:45, they've been here for 3 hours and show no signs of leaving since they just called in a takeout order. I'm so aggravated and I don't know what to do. I can't go introduce myself and then ignore them, it's as bad as not coming out at all. And I am totally not in the mood to meet people.

There's nothing anyone can do for me but I wanted to complain. Since I can't go 8 hours without a bathroom break I guess I'll have to confront the situation sooner or later, but it's just not right. The worst part is they're people my age and they NEVER react with anything but laughter to a 22 year old who lives with her parents and doesnt' come out of her room to socialize.

Well they can get bent frankly. I just want to take a nap.

Why do these people insist on ruining a perfectly good day......

It's 7:15 and they're STILL HERE.

I'm getting seriously annoyed. I've gone out and introduced myself and gotten some dinner. I'm never going to understand people who enjoy seven to eight hour social visits. I start to feel as if I'm imposing after an hour or so...especially since we just met these people today!

ARGH.

Ms. Anthropist wrote:It's 7:15 and they're STILL HERE.

ARGH.

Been there, done that! Grit your teeth and tell 'em you've got a headache!

I share your pain, Ms. Anthropist. You need to be alone to function, so let those people think whatever they want.

When I went to job related interviews, that drained me for most part of the day. I could stop procrastinating again around six p.m, but I felt dizzy, if not nauseous, for the rest of the morning. My grandmother died last week and I didn't stand for more than an hour among them during lunch before I felt like I couldn't get up from the chair, so I spent those three days claiming empty rooms and looking out through windows with my back to the corridors.

Good luck. Don't bother with excuses. You shouldn't worry for doing what you have to do.

Thanks guys. I haven't come out again, but just the fact that they are here and noisy is stressing me out. They're still here, and more people have arrived. I really just need to get out of my home situation, it's really unhealthy for me. But thanks for listening in the meantime!

Ms. Anthropist wrote:Since I can't go 8 hours without a bathroom break I guess I'll have to confront the situation sooner or later, but it's just not right.

If you were a male I would say piss in a pop can/beer bottle, etc. I have been in your situation many times. My mother's boyfriend used to like to host his biker club parties at my house. That bastards friends made my life a living hell. 50+ bikers and their 'biker bitches' all getting plastered and passing out until the next days afternoon. Ugh.

Feeling like a captive in your own home. Sucks ass, I know.

I threw myself to dwell in the basement to avoid the rest of my family, they still find their annoying little ways of creeping in like rats.

"I sure like to succeed, but you can't deny the great liberty failure affords a man"
-from little big man


Try to find some quiet, portable hobbies, reading, wriitng, maybe get a laptop to take with you when things get too hectic around the household. Finding something that can hold your interest for longer than a few minutes might be difficult, finding something to do with yourself is a bitch.

Ms. Anthropist wrote:It's 7:15 and they're STILL HERE.

I'm getting seriously annoyed. I've gone out and introduced myself and gotten some dinner. I'm never going to understand people who enjoy seven to eight hour social visits. I start to feel as if I'm imposing after an hour or so...especially since we just met these people today!

ARGH.

I had a similiar problem with a "friend" just before my total detachment from my bad friends in my early teens (13-14 yo).

This guy, often came to my house at 17:00, and stayed for 6-8 hours parasiting on me (80% of the time he did annoying things like paiting his whole hand with a marker pen, and the other 20% he read donald duck comics and borrowed my computer to check emails and communitys).

Anyway, I never found out what was wrong with this guy, but I have my guesses. He is showing a lot of symptoms associated with anti-social personality disorder. He is a leeching and lying son of a bitch, parasiting on others, but he is unaware of this - unaware that it is socially wrong.
Whatever. He probably had problems at home - not that I give a damn but whatever. Every is linked together - cause and effect.
People are like this for a reason.

So, what does this has to do with SPD?
Well it was in times like this (hell, EVERYTIME a "friend" visited me) that I wished that they would leave, go home, leave me alone. I never wanted them there. My so called "friends" never benefit me in any way. That is why I disconnected from them.

Recently my uncle and cousin came to visit while I was staying with my parents. I wanted nothing at all to do with them, not because they are bad people and I dislike them, but because I didn't want to talk to them and do the whole 'loving family' thing. I'm naturally very irritable and petulant when it comes to having to deal with other people if I can away with it (i.e. not at work or in public), so rather than tolerating them, in my mind I chose the lesser of two evils: to inconvenience myself.

I found out what time they were coming over, and then left with my mp3 player loaded with radio programs and podcasts. Because I had nowhere else to go I drove around, found a secluded parking space where I wouldn't be bothered, and then listened to my programs for eight hours. Eventually I came home at around three in the morning, slept for 4 hours, and then left again so I wouldn't see them in the morning.

All in all, I severely inconvenienced myself over a weekend where I would much rather have been sleeping, using the computer and reading. But it was worth it. I can't stand 'family'.

I didn't have any anxiety about it; it just annoys me. By and large, I would take hours out of my day over offering a simple hello and goodbye to someone if I can help it (and I'm not feeling too lazy).