Coping mechanisms

What do you do to cope with the world when it's overwhelming?

I listen to music--just about anything so long as it's my choosing. I love my mp3 player for this reason. Just knowing I have it with me makes me feel better.

I also read and write.

Using time (I use time--that's the best way to get rid of it) by piddling around online is another big one for me.

My ideal situation is listening to music while reading/writing/piddling online.

i think my biggest recent coping mechanism was that i bought a car. i have serious problems on public transport (not just because of psychological things, i have bad hips too) so for me it's been a total godsend. my anxiety levels have dropped dramatically because no one can get near me in the car unless i invite them in. it's made my life infinitely easier.

other than that if i have to go on pub transport or out in a public place i'll always have my ipod. i'm somewhat obsessed with music and have around 9,000 tracks on there so i always have something to occupy my mind. i usually take a book or magazine too just to hide behind.

i have also had self harm issues, mainly in the past, although i still do it from time to time, which is kind of odd because it's not a classic schizoid trait nor really a classic bipolar trait. but hey, there it is. i like to be different.

Wow. I have about 8,500 on mine. I like being able to have playlists for any mood.

I do the self harm thing occasionally, as well, but it's always when I'm having anxiety from people in my life. I've been pretty good the last couple years, though every now and then the only way to feel better is to cut.

I've not had to use public transport very much, but when I do it makes me anxious. In England people leave you alone a bit more than in the States, though. Everyone pretends to be in their own little bubble.

Alex Foster wrote:What do you do to cope with the world when it's overwhelming?

I listen to music--just about anything so long as it's my choosing. I love my mp3 player for this reason. Just knowing I have it with me makes me feel better.

I'm probably one of the rare schizoids who doesn't listen to music on a regular basis. This is not because I don't like music - in fact I've always been very interested in music and it usually has a powerful effect on me. I find that while listening to music though, I just can't concentrate on anything else, and so I don't like having it going in the background. I'm very selective about when I listen to music - 99% of the time I prefer peace and quiet.

As to your first question, I do burn my fingers in hot water on occasion, so I can kind of understand the self-harm stuff. This is only when things get really bad though. In truth, I don't feel this way much because I just don't care anymore. I no longer expect to get anything positive out of life. I just go through the motions, taking one day at a time with no concern for the future - nothing matters to me. It is the most powerful coping mechanism, and maybe the only benefit to SPD.

AC

Acid Crystal wrote: I find that while listening to music though, I just can't concentrate on anything else, and so I don't like having it going in the background. I'm very selective about when I listen to music - 99% of the time I prefer peace and quiet.

i'm kind of the same. i can't have music on while i'm doing uni work or anything else that i need to try to focus on. well, actually i do, i put classical music on so it's very much background and quite quiet. i can't really listen to anything with lyrics because i get distracted.

also, more and more i'm noticing that i don't automatically put itunes on while i'm on the computer. i used to do it before anything else but now i often forget.

In truth, I don't feel this way much because I just don't care anymore.

i don't know whether this entirely relates but feel almost the opposite and i find i SH often because i just don't care. it's kind of hard to explain but i think most people see SH as quite a drastic thing, even those who do it - is it a schizoid thing to not really even register that? i don't have any feelings about my body, so i am free to mess it up as i wish. i think this is partly because i was born quite scarred (well, it was from surgery so not quite born, but since i can remember) so i don't really feel anything "bad" about making more scars. people tell me that it's a shocking thing but that's not how it feels. it's something that feels good, of which there are too few, and it's no skin off my nose if i cause damage.

dogtanian wrote:

Acid Crystal wrote: I find that while listening to music though, I just can't concentrate on anything else, and so I don't like having it going in the background. I'm very selective about when I listen to music - 99% of the time I prefer peace and quiet.

i'm kind of the same. i can't have music on while i'm doing uni work or anything else that i need to try to focus on. well, actually i do, i put classical music on so it's very much background and quite quiet. i can't really listen to anything with lyrics because i get distracted.

I listen to classical when working for that reason. I also listen to trance, acid jazz and more techno-oriented music because it often has no words. If I've heard something enough times the words don't distract me anymore, so I have whole playlists of things like Portishead, Pram, Massive Attack and that kind of mope hop. If it's something I'm unfamiliar with or rock then I can't listen to it while doing anything else.

In truth, I don't feel this way much because I just don't care anymore.

I hadn't thought about it that way before. I used to cut because I wasn't being the person I thought I was supposed to be (I didn't care about anything the way 'normal' people did). Now that I've completely accepted my indifferent self I wonder if that will change...

dogtanian wrote:i don't know whether this entirely relates but feel almost the opposite and i find i SH often because i just don't care. it's kind of hard to explain but i think most people see SH as quite a drastic thing, even those who do it - is it a schizoid thing to not really even register that? i don't have any feelings about my body, so i am free to mess it up as i wish. i think this is partly because i was born quite scarred (well, it was from surgery so not quite born, but since i can remember) so i don't really feel anything "bad" about making more scars. people tell me that it's a shocking thing but that's not how it feels. it's something that feels good, of which there are too few, and it's no skin off my nose if i cause damage.

Hmmm...SH is something I've never really understood, because as far as I can tell, people do it for completely different reasons. I think the most common thing is when someone is in so much emotional pain that the physical pain is actually welcome and distracting. I've also heard people insist that they deserve to feel pain, but that implies there is some standard of judgement by which they are coming to that conclusion. From what I've seen, people with SPD tend to be somewhat numb to emotional pain and also aren't bothered much by social judgement...which is why it may not be a usual schizoid trait. I dunno - for me it's always been about conditioning myself to feel physical pain, because it really bothers me to live in fear of it. It's not really a shocking thing for me either - I know I'm weird for doing it, but I'm used to that feeling and it doesn't bother me. I don't think I could say the act of inflicting physical pain on myself is pleasurable though...at least not in the usual sense of the word. Is that how you would describe it?

AC

i dunno, what you say makes sense, to be honest. i'm not really entirely sure why i started doing it, but i think it was usually around my hospital check up visits, so i guess it may have been related. over the years it just carried on, i guess.

i don't only do it in times that i guess poeple would say were emotionally difficult, sometimes i do it for no particular/apparent reason. it does make me feel quite nice and calm though.

dogtanian wrote:i don't only do it in times that i guess poeple would say were emotionally difficult, sometimes i do it for no particular/apparent reason. it does make me feel quite nice and calm though.

Perhaps because you are taking control of your body in a sense by forcing it to feel pain? That's the first thing that comes to my mind because I often feel like my mind is disconnected from my body as if it were completely external like everything else around me. But I don't know if this feeling is common for people in general with SPD.

AC

Acid Crystal wrote:I often feel like my mind is disconnected from my body as if it were completely external like everything else around me. But I don't know if this feeling is common for people in general with SPD.

i often feel that way too.
I don't believe in dualism of the mind and body, (if you die, its over, nothing remains) but it often feel like my mind has nothing to do with my body.
i once said that i would have found it easier if we had all just been floating brains. the only response i got were weird looks.
and this may sounds stupid as well .... but when i pass a mirror, the first thought that comes up is "oh yeah, that's right, that's how i look, it had slipped my mind."