you and your family

dogtanian wrote:i can understand the schizoid idea that it's better to live at home where there are 2 people who may not understand but who tolerate than to live out where you have to interact outside the house and stuff.

sadly my parents hassled me to death when i lived with them.

Yes, and I think that's just an area where I was luckier than most. I do get hassled from time to time but I've learned how to deal with it pretty well. To be honest, my parents are pretty busy and don't have that much time to bug me...otherwise they probably would.

AC

mine have just retired so they have extra hassling time. yay!

dogtanian wrote:

Alex Foster wrote:You know those kids on bad TV shows whose stupidly rich parents are always jetting off to some island and leaving them alone in the house and they feel 'neglected'? I'd kill for that situation. My parents would come home after a month on the Riviera and I'd say, 'You left?'

sounds great doesn't it?

Yes! Where's the queue for being adopted by that type of couple?

dogtanian wrote:

Isn't one of the criteria for SPD something like: Has no emotional connection with others outside of perhaps a first degree relation ?

i've mentioned a lot my lack of connection with my parents, in fact i think i would say i have more connection (if you can call it that) with my 3 friends than with my family. pretty much because i opted to get into that situation with these friends, but i'd still not really say our friendships were normal. we never really see eachother, speak on the phone sometimes or email but that's it really.

That makes sense to me. The only person I have a real connection with is my husband and we certainly weren't related prior to being married. We live in the American South but we don't live *that* far south!

In my case, if our condition is is biological, my family certainly made it much worse. My mother's father regularly beat them up and now she has the maturity of a twelve years old girl in a quite old body. My father is a baboon with the cognitive abilities of a brick and has never tried to be a father beyond the biological sense. More than that, my mother thought it was her right to read my diaries and my notebooks when I was out there, which I didn't do much because she tried to make me afraid of everything and everyone. I feel so much resentment from time to time that I could kill them both. I remember I thought "I will never love so I will not end up like them".

Whenever I was forced to attend family reunions, I would flee to an empty room and wait there until it ended. I couldn't stand being among complete strangers having to answer stupid questions. They were quite uptight to, so they labelled me the black sheep and would not stop harassing me. I haven't seen them since I was 18 years old, and I hope I never will.

When I finally get my own apartment, I don't think I'll call my first degree relatives unless I need something. The only one I'm curious about is my sister, but I can't stand interacting with her more than five minutes.

In general, I think I'm more confortable among complete strangers (even having in mind I don't like it at all) than among my family. I think it's because they have more access to my private life.

My family are the only ones who I can be around without havcing a problem. And as in fanily, I'm talking about my father, mother, and two sisters that live and have lived with us...

My other brothers and sister...and extended family....nan....

I guess I don't mind because I had lived with them for all of my life, and I just have no problems... though I do get aggitated with my mother when she tries to work on a lot of music with me... but thats anotther story...

My parents think I am perfectly normal, because I am an eccentric schizoid. I fake emotional faces, unconciously. (Exaggerated facial expressions.)

On the other hand, they dont get me, and they annoy the living $#%^ out of me. My father tries to pound the "ITS WRONG" idealogy into me, thinking I am a fool.

"Its wrong."
"Why is it wrong? Hello? Stop reasoning like a child."
"Because its not healthy."
"Why?"
"Because it isn't."
"WHY?"
"ITS WRONG!"

i get things like that too.

"you should call that old "friend" who you haven't seen since school"
"why?"
"because you spend too much time on your own"
"but i like being on my own"
"but it's not healthy, you will be lonely"
"but i'm happier alone"
"but you'll be lonely"
"no, i won't, i prefer being alone"
"but won't you be lonely?"

ad infinitum....

the way i see it - IF i ever do get lonely, hell, i'll call some of these so called friends