I thınk ı am schızoid :(

Isme wrote:Messing with people's heads won't get you many friends.

Actually it will, as long as you aren't vicious about it. People engage in friendly verbal sparring all the time and the ones who are good at it tend to be popular. Just watch them.

Isme wrote:Most people want, like and respect honesty in others; they don't like being around people who deliberately play games or mess with their heads.

Are you sure about that? When old friends get together and reminisce, what do they talk about? "Remember that time so-and-so said such-and-such to so-and-so and he flipped out and did yadda-yadda? That was hilarious!" People love this crap.

prot wrote:HA YEAH RIGHT. Try be honest for a day. you obviosly havnt studied it. try it for a week and post back. it will make you more enemies. i have been personaly told i was to straight fowad and honest by people who know me.

you have to remember its not what you say but how you feel when you say it.

Being honest can work if you smile and say whatever you're saying like it's a joke. You have to signal that you aren't trying to hurt anyone, you're just telling it like it is. It helps if what you're saying is something everyone else is thinking but doesn't have the guts to say. You also need to watch people's reactions and be prepared to backpedal quickly if it's not going over well. If you watch stand up comedy you'll notice that many of the jokes are just honest observations told as jokes.

Being honest can work if you smile and say whatever you're saying like it's a joke. You have to signal that you aren't trying to hurt anyone, you're just telling it like it is. It helps if what you're saying is something everyone else is thinking but doesn't have the guts to say. You also need to watch people's reactions and be prepared to backpedal quickly if it's not going over well. If you watch stand up comedy you'll notice that many of the jokes are just honest observations told as jokes.

i actually use this teqniuqe, modified. i turn what i have to say into jokes. that way i dont have to go about lying.

theres one prblem. depending on the person im ether funny or sarcastic

if the joke is intellectual in nature im a sacastic asshole

if its not, well then im funny.

Yup, you gotta know your audience. Keep track of what sort of people are receptive to this technique and only use it with them.

As schizoids, I think we tend to reduce everything to its entertainment value. If it doesn't feel revelevant or interesting to us, we're ready to move on. Productive conversation isn't about being entertained. It's about active, empathetic listening. True conversartion isn't easy, and not always fun.

I've found that if you want to keep yourself out of trouble while conversing, before saying anything ask yourself 3 questions:
Does it need to be said?
Is it the truth?
Is it kind?

Layered wrote:I've found that if you want to keep yourself out of trouble while conversing, before saying anything ask yourself 3 questions:
Does it need to be said?
Is it the truth?
Is it kind?

These are the rules I follow when I'm trying to get rid of people who want to be my friend, such as when people at work insist I meet them for lunch. I'm very polite, say very little, and never say anything that could possibly offend someone. They find me nice but horribly dull, thank me for coming, and never invite me back.

I've found that if you want to keep yourself out of trouble while conversing, before saying anything ask yourself 3 questions:
Does it need to be said?
Is it the truth?
Is it kind?

and if nothing meets those requirenments?

you fake it right. nod your head and smile. that is so painfull.

ill throw the 1st and 3rd rule to the winds.

prot wrote:

I've found that if you want to keep yourself out of trouble while conversing, before saying anything ask yourself 3 questions:
Does it need to be said?
Is it the truth?
Is it kind?

and if nothing meets those requirenments?

you fake it right. nod your head and smile. that is so painfull.

ill throw the 1st and 3rd rule to the winds.

These are meant to be mere guidelines. Not set set-in-stone, always right rules.

Layered wrote:I've found that if you want to keep yourself out of trouble while conversing, before saying anything ask yourself 3 questions

Does it need to be said? --> No, people already know, well it depends on who you are, it depends. imo.
Is it the truth? --> my truth
Is it kind?--> not always

i think i'll become autist. imo. people need passion to talk. i still dont know the difference between schizoid or the negative symptoms of schizphrenia..do you people have passions? im having a hard time staying alive because i've find lil/no pleasure anymore. who took my cheese.

Passions are painful. They make me tired and make my head hurt. I don't have the emotional energy for passions.