At what age did you first feel that you wanted to be alone?

Not working but I copied and pasted it.

its a one two punch so to speak. if you have the personality type then you will be more likely to develop the disorder. and it usually manifests itself around the age of 10 -12 though in some cases it can manifest itself earlier depending on the environment. the ages of 10-12 is when a child really starts developing social skills. when they attempt to do this they begin to feel different inside. they want to be alone more than they want to be around people and the other children often treat these loners in a negative way. that negative treatment spurs on the development of the disorder.

lisaterry wrote:its a one two punch so to speak. if you have the personality type then you will be more likely to develop the disorder. and it usually manifests itself around the age of 10 -12 though in some cases it can manifest itself earlier depending on the environment. the ages of 10-12 is when a child really starts developing social skills. when they attempt to do this they begin to feel different inside. they want to be alone more than they want to be around people and the other children often treat these loners in a negative way. that negative treatment spurs on the development of the disorder.

Okay but I still don't believe that it's a trait that you are born with. For two main reasons:
-My own childhood. For me it was from white to black just like that. Up to age 10 I was very social, had many friends, didn't like to spend time alone. And after age 10-14 it became the opposite. I doubt that any "trait" that I had before triggered due to some event.

-The human brain grows a lot and doesn't stop growing until the age of 20 (approx). A new born child only have a brain weight of about 25% of an adult's brain's weight... and the brain builds and removes different neural connections in different phases during childhood. And since the brain is that part of the human body that science know the least about - I don't think there is enough evidence to say that we are born with certain traits just like that. No, I think that deep personality traits are formed, not born with.
Very unorthodox I know, but then Im not really the religious person.

why did it turn from white to black then? what caused it? if you liked socializing and such and had friends then why didnt you keep likeing it? why did you suddenly stop liking it? that is my point. you always had the tendancy to be a loner because you had a schizoid personality. it was just buried because of your environment. you having friends etc. when you got to be the age when that changed that is when it surfaced. it was always there.

I don't know lisa (or was it drew)? That's what I've been trying to find out.

I've already heard your argument and Im not willing to accept that people are born with traits, simply because we aren't born with a whole brain, so let us not loop ourselves but get back to the original subject now thank you.

The whole nature/nurture issue probably causes as many arguments as the whole does God exist question. So far neither seems to have any definitve answer however where schizoid p.d. is concerned I come down on the nature side of the argument.
The need to be amongst others has been an essential part of the survival homo sapiens throught the whole of our evolution so I doubt that any childhood trauma could be severe enough to cause an otherwise normal child to develop schizoid p.d.
Perhaps in adulthood a traumatic event could cause someone to choose to live in isolation but I would not consider someone who makes that choice to be a true schizoid. In schizoids the desire to be alone is not a matter of choice it is one of psychological necessity.

To answer the original question I can't remember a time when I did not want to be alone.

Artificial Lifeform wrote:Uhm, yea... When did you start feeling schizoid?

When I was told I was one at the age of 40. Though I've enjoyed being alone as long as I can remember I've never consciously known this as a need before I suddenly realized what I've been doing all these years. Basically I just got bored very quickly in the company of others and removed myself from them whenever I could. I had friends until I was about 22.

Interesting debate, but I have to agree mostly with Lisa. I believe we are born with certain traits and even without external environmental factors we will always end up a certain way. There are many studies that have been done on twins seperated at birth and the studies show that even when the twins grow up in completely different environments they usually always end up with the same personality style.

And also I forgot to mention in my other post, but when my mom was pregrant with me, during the latter stages of the pregnancy she started developing complications. I can't remember what kind of complications exactly, but she told me there was a very good chance that she was going to loose me. She was given the option to terminate the pregnancy becuase if she continued with it there would be significant risk to her health. She ultimately decided to risk it and continue on with the pregnancy. So in order to maintain the pregnancy the doctors gave her high doses of progesterone. Then the doctors warned her that if I was born I would be different somehow. My mom told me the doctors said I would somehow end up smarter and/or have a different way of thinking. Now I'm not sure how the doctors came up with that theory, but I think they were right since I turned out to be the way I am. So I definately think I was born with these traits and as I grew older the traits grew stronger.

The pics I've seen of me as baby; I looked awful happy to be around folks. I look at them pics now and long for that delighted smile to crack across my face once again, long for all the nice feelings behind it.

Off to nursery school I was sent. I remember horror. It can be argued I was sent there prematurely, corroborating the nurture causation position. I won't bore u with my list of tales, covering the years of nursery school and kindergarten.

Persistent malaise prompted me to speak with a therapist sometime mid-high-school, 9-10 grade. I masked well in this one to one setting, leading the therapist to ask, on my third or fourth visit, "Why are you here?" I answered, "I don't know." With that, I discontinued our sessions.

Senior year, high school (1985-86), sought counseling once again. Now this practitioner suggested I might have a schizoid personality condition, explaining the minor details of said condition. He did not weigh heavily on the matter however. I don't think I had any more sessions with him thereafter.

I discovered the medicinal benefits of cannabis and alcohol. For about a decade, I felt pretty normal. I could relate with other people. The stupid $#%^ they always said, over and over, made perfect sense to me...how could I have missed the logic all these years?

As is so often the case, greater and greater quantities of my medicines were required for the desired effect, 'till one day the effect had become so elusive that no amount of illicit chemicals could recapture it.

My old self was forcing through. Oh boy, that pissed me off, to no end.

So, now I do AA and MA, and the same old $#%^ goes through my head and heart every time I gotta deal with people, just like I'm in nursery school again. I thought, if I go to these meetings, be honest, do the steps, talk to people, etc etc, I'll get over this social thing, being "socially retarded" my wife calls it (nice).

No luck.

Yesterday, at work, out back in the warehouse where we can smoke, I got to thinking again about my self. Trying to put my finger on this thing. I had a vision...no, not like that...like a poetic manifestation of my heart. It's like this:

---------------------------
I am standing.
A throng of people, everyone, in the distance, before me.
I am looking at their backs.
They are walking, off somewhere.
I am not moving.
----------------------------

So I finished my smoke, got back to my desk and computer, and set out to find out about this Schizoid Personality Disorder I'd been likened to some 20 years back.

Google, google. Click, click.

There I was. Me. I was described, outlined, pinpointed. Right there on the WWW. No need for me ever to have been born, I exist entirely already, within a diagnosis.

Hi, my name is Dave.

my wife calls it

You're married too? How is this even possible for a schizoid to be married unless it was to another schizoid? I just can't understand how or why someone else would want to be married to someone who has virtually nothing to offer. And I also just can't understand why a schizoid would want to make such a huge life long comitment such as marriage. Can someone explain this to me, because I don't get it.