Do you avoid relationships and sex?

PA11 wrote:

Rhab wrote:I have dated a highly attractive and narcissistic woman who was very controlling, I found this to be an ideal partner. It was a treat to have her make most decisions, dominate conversations in public and not emotionally intrude.

She left me for a more attractive and wealthier man.

I missed her intensely for some time.

Being able to piggyback off a girl's social life like that actually sounds strangely appealing.

Interesting. I've allowed friends to take over most "socializing work" for me in the past, though I'm ok face to face so I haven't tended to allow others to dominate conversations all the time, I neglect to keep up most social contact outside of those interactions so having other people doing that side of things was really helpful for me in the past. Unfortunately, its not necessarily a realistic way to live life in the long term and produces particular results in who you spend time with.

I'm not sure what I'd diagnose the friend with, lol but he was quite socially dramatic and didn't require too much interpersonal/emotional input, seemed quite happy not to take life too seriously.

Interestingly I've noticed I can actually get on with people who are like that (in some ways, lol - meaning outgoing chatty etc.) - I guess there are different ways different people get on with each other, and those kind of people are happy to carry the conversation and interaction which is something I can do artificially but it will tend to fall apart if im tired or stressed because its not my relaxed/natural way of being.

So yeah, i can understand that.

i once had the idee of a relationship so i could get here friends and familly cause i was bored with mine
i'm formless i need something to reflect on
so i get it

i'd say i have an active sex drive and have tried to be more social with the opposite sex to get laid but back then some serious alarms would go off in my body...so much that my eyes would start twitching and my lip would quiver as if to signal an eventual bout of weeping. The eye-twitching thing was always the strangest because they would twitch in their own ways and look in different directions as if my mind were so stimulated by the misery I was putting myself through that I couldn't even see straight.

Now I'm a little more relaxed and try to have a cool and calm about me when speaking with the opposite sex. Being in a relationship seems absolutely out of the question at the moment and I can't imagine the awkwardness of sober sex anymore.

Just wondering but....is it not uncommon for people with schizoid to be totally social and with people when on a hallucinogenic like marijuana? Even clever? Charming?

I only think I'm schizoid based on the wrap sheet:

- prefer being with one person
- don't really like doing anything social
- try to keep myself even so i'm always level headed (i used to vary from various personality extremes as a lad thinking this was who I was.

Have always been lonely but never liked having anyone around. Usually shunned family outings, trips with friends, making plans or any sort of commitment, acting out, etc...

Rumination is common.....so is sorta tagging along but I've learned just keeping my business to myself and "getting back to..." people is better than making commitments on the fly.


Never had a gf till college and even then it seemed like I was never as close as I wanted us to be.

ya i avoid everything and everyone...i'm learning that activities that involve people doing far exceeds my comfortability in social groups and ability to conform

I avoid sex in a relationship because I'm bad at it and I might turn her off. I'm not that physically affectionate. It doesn't mean I'm not a loving guy, it's just that my dick has a mind of its own. I have sex with prostitutes because it makes me feel less self-conscious, more relaxed. Don't have to worry about my performance because she'll be gone in an hour. I'm particularly nuts about Japanese massage girls; they're very exciting. So I have practical reasons for me being the way I am, and if the norms don't like it, they can f off.

I know this isn't schizoid behaviour but nevermind.
I met someone today I haven't seen for a while, and he kept looking at me with an admiring smile on his face, as if he had really missed me and was happy to see me. Even I could figure out that he's gotta have feelings for me. I couldn't go away because it happened at an important meeting but it made me feel very uncomfortable and unfocused, and after it was over I was anxious had this horrible headache kind of thing for thirty minutes.

If I were normal person I would have been flattered because I fancy him a little (physically) and we've always gotten along well, but today reminded me that it has always been like this for me.

.

^Asinine

Rob K' wrote:sorry. was trying to be funny.

Never mind.

###$ yeah last time i came close to getting laid i was at a gig and was wigging out when this really drunk pretty girl thought that groping and kissing me would make me feel better i gave her the slip and she left with 2 other dudes for a semi consenting 3 way .