How have others reacted?

So to begin I'm ######6 stupid. I decided to get rather high one night and then in a fit of insanity decided that the two "friends" sitting next to me would understand that I think I'm a schizoid.

Instantly regretted it but I had already said it and I can't bend time unfortunately to erase my mistake. They both seemed quite surprised I had been depressed/schizoidal which I took as a compliment to the effectiveness of my mask. They just thought I was a bit "odd". Anyway we went on to talk about the meaning of life and they thought there were was some kind of meaning. One didn't know but was optimistic that there was and the other believed that this life was preparation for the next. I disagreed, saying that there is most likely not a point to life and they both called me naive. I bit my tongue but decided I had already said too many outlying opinions. They then said that they didn't really believe that I was schizoid, I was just having a rough patch and blowing things out of proportions. I rapidly accepted this and told them they were probably right, even though I've had these thoughts consistently for upwards of a quarter of my life. Then my other "friend" said that if I was about to kill myself he would rather have my locked up in a mental house. That just served as another example as to why I don't really want to remain "friends" with this group. Free will should always prevail in my mind.

Anyway has anybody ever opened up and told anyone else about their true selves? I've learnt to never ever EVER do it again. While it is quite amusing looking back on some parts of it, I would have preferred if I had just shut my mouth.

Anyway has anybody ever opened up and told anyone else about their true selves?

Nope I figured they'd think I was crazy. I almost did when my 'friend' and my brother said they thought I was depressed when I wasn't at the time.

I did once, regret it but they got so used to my mask that they refuse to believe me. Never should have put on the mask in the first place and expect somebody to understand the real you. I hate people.

There is a difference between covert and overt. As an overt, I am sure people wonder what is wrong with me as soon as they meet me. So when I tell them I am schizoid, they accept it. It is kind of like "oh, that's whats wrong with you".

I am not sure if people really know what it means to be schizoid. Most might confuse it with schizophrenia or avoidant personality disorder. Your "mask" would also throw them off. You would have to be your natural self around them.

As far as world views go, the way I look at it is whatever makes you happy. So if you like the idea that there is no point to life, keep it. If you like to believe your life has a purpose, then go ahead and think that.

Non's know what makes them sad. So having no friends and never falling in love would make them very sad. They might even think of killing themselves. So they assume that holds true for schizoids as well. I have explained to a person online about the way some schizoids view life. His response was "that's sad". I am curious what the rate of suicide for non's versus schizoids would be.

I have told a very close friend. Her reaction was disbelief, too. My diagnosis was attributed to stress from school. It doesn't bother me that she disagreed with my diagnosis. I just appreciated her concern, which was genuine because I rarely talk about my weaknesses.

I don't think your friends' reaction was wrong, insensitive yes, but not unexpected. It shows you have a different way of perceiving things than they do. You can't expect everyone to see things and people the same way you do.

The name-calling ("naive") was insensitive. I wish you had said something in turn to them about their being "too full of themselves" given their all knowingness over your naïveté.

Vreedzame wrote:Anyway has anybody ever opened up and told anyone else about their true selves? I've learnt to never ever EVER do it again. While it is quite amusing looking back on some parts of it, I would have preferred if I had just shut my mouth.

Absolutely not. People are ignorant and foolish, usually dismissing what they don't understand. Mental illness gets a pretty bad rap in general, and that's for major things like clinical depression and schizophrenia.

Comparatively minor or difficult to understand issues like ours will get far less understanding and acceptance, and that's without the argument surrounding personality disorders in general. Heck my mother is a mental health nurse and I wouldn't tell her [our relationship is abysmal, but I wouldn't tell her anyway.] Then again, the person I trust most is my dad but I only told him about my army ambitions because circumstances forced me to. My siblings didn't and don't know, even since I've abandoned my application.

I can see no advantage and a huge potential problem telling people. Even if you trust someone not to gossip, it takes 20 seconds to wikipedia SPD and just as long to conclude that you are 'faking" your friendship. SPD takes a long time to understand and appreciate, if I was to tell someone it would have to be someone I trusted far more than I have ever trusted someone else. Possibly if I ever found a partner, but I doubt it.

Never ever EVER tell anyone.

Trust me.

Let them believe/think whatever what they want about you.

I'm pretty positive that I will never tell any of my friends about being schizoid. When I was 16, I told my best friend of 3 years that I had depression, and that ended our friendship. I was just trying to explain to her why I had broken up with my boyfriend of the time (who was a mutual friend of ours, so she was angry with me) and explain why I wasn't seeing her that often and why I was acting kinda weird when I did see her. (I too, was really out of it and not thinking straight, otherwise I don't think I would have said anything. I think I was on some mix of vodka, codeine, and weed). Things weren't the same after. I can't explain it. We saw each other less and less and eventually stopped altogether, even though we spent every weekend together from the ages of 13-15. I regretted telling her so much, for a long time I wished I could take it back. I never want to do anything like that again, especially not for something like schizoid.
Rob's definitely right that it's easier for people to understand an overt than a covert. If your friends didn't suspect anything about you (apart from being "odd" or "off"), then it might come as a shock to them when they google SPD and figure that you've been faking your friendship, they'll probably be angry. But I guess it can go either way. Maybe they'll forget about it, or maybe they think you're just talking $#%^, or maybe they'll actually understand it and nothing will change (which I guess is a good thing) or they might be more understanding (this is optimistic). Maybe you can play it off as "oh I just meant I'm introverted, that's all". I guess in the near future, you'll see how they really react. And maybe their opinion of you will be shaped more by the way you act around them in the near future than by what you said when you were all high.

I told my mom a few weeks ago, to try to explain some of my behaviour that had her worried. I just wanted to say "Please stop worrying about me being alone. It doesn't bother me, so it shouldn't bother you." But then she looked it up and she asked me if I wanted to be a part of this family (not really), do I think human life has intrinsic value (no), do I love my family ("Ummm, yeah I'm very fond of you, and I probably love you, I just don't feel the need to have any more contact with you guys than is really necessary"). And now I have to answer questions like this every three days. Time will tell if it did more harm than good, but I think it's better I tell her now while I'm still living at home than when I leave the house and maybe don't keep in contact.

But about your situation, I think you should keep in contact and act normal (whatever that is). They don't have any reason to not want you around, and they're probably fond of you if you've been friends for this long.
I'm sorry your friends had to react like that, that really sucks.

I'm astounded at the negative impact it can have when people find out about one having SPD.

I told my best friend and he couldn't believe it so I spelled it out for him. He's accepting of it as he has something too, not exactly sure what-it's like we're sick buddies haha, so he can relate. As for my family and friends, no way I'm telling them. I may tell my family in time as I learn more about it, as I do kinda want to explain why I'm not like my sister or like everyday people, but you have to be in my inner circle for me to tell you what I have. If you haven't gone through anything related to mental health, you wouldn't understand.