Accepting Diagnoses Feels So Odd

After 25 plus years of struggling with myself and the world around me, to begin to accept the diagnoses, is the weirdest feeling I can't put my finger on. I've run on nothing but adrenaline and fight for so many years, afraid someone anyone would look at me and know how sick I am, how broken and unacceptable. To find what schizoaffective really means and to finally identify with something is...so much an odd relief. I am a almost 34 year old woman who has had episodes and visions and auditory hallucinations since I was 8. I've been homeless and stable, always alone, no friends, nothing ever concrete. It is just so relieving to realize there is a name for my struggle... and medicine that is actually working for me. I have never participated in any forums like this, I like the fact I can be brutally honest and you can't see me lol. I just wanted to express my thoughts on this crazy crazy rollercoaster ride.

I'm glad you have a diagnosis and treatment now. Hopefully now you can start to build a good life for yourself. I'm sorry you've struggled so long with this.

Thanks for that encouragement. Definately in the rebuilding stage and actually hopeful. Gotta start somewhere.

To Lullybye:
Your words are very encouraging to me as I am finally accepting my diagnoses too. Your quite a bit younger than me and you have a wonderful future ahead of yourself!!
Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing!!!

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder several months ago. I internally disputed this diagnosis as I would only have hallucinatory effects after binge drinking or taking certain meds that would trigger my pshychosis and anxiety. I would say, prior to my taking Adderall, I was able to live a fairly productive life without the constraints of psychosis but I always had the kind of anti-social and introverted/lack of close relationships staples of schizophrenia or the "schizo" spectrum.

I now have come to terms with this condition at age 25 and I am hopeful that I can live a healthy and fulfilling lifestyle.

Thank you for sharing and I hope all goes well.

the prognosis is ok for this disorder.

u can start feeling better after 8-12 years. the outcome is not great but ok.

u probly will be on disability for that long.. unless u want to work part-time which is useless since they deduct 60% of my disability and i dont have a college degree yet.

if i get through college i would quit disability i can't ever afford anything good like a car, house, tv, gifts, nice clothes