I harassed a friend

Hello, so I said some hurtful things I didn’t mean. Apologised to my friend for it, he accepted it. However, because I still felt bad about it I sent him altogether almost 20 messages in two separate days that was Saturday and Tuesday, apologising and promising to be a better friend and also congratulating him for doing a good job in studies, but because he didn’t reply in both days. It just looks like a long stream of 20 messages.

But I didn’t sound threatening, I really just apologised profusely and asked if I could work hard to be good friends with him. All messages were positive. And I only sent him those messages because I felt anxious about losing the friendship.

But now I feel like I have harassed him and I feel terrible. He may see me as a clingy friend and a stalker. And he might even pursue legal action.

Could you stop trying to contact him for some time and try to recover your internal security ?

Yes sure definitely

-- Wed Jun 27, 2018 8:27 pm --

Do you think I might get into trouble for this?

I don't know.

Better think about it later, once you feel better.

Honestly, not everyone can get passed things said when they are hurtful, depending on exactly what was said. I think a lot of times we think bc we apologize to that person it makes everything all better and they should put what happened behind them, however there are words said that no apology can fix. I know we can say things out of anger however it has been my experience that what we say when angry or upset is the truth of the matter , the way we really feel. Not always, but often.

I am going to assume however correct me if I'm wrong that this is not the first time you've been verbally abusive to your friend ? There is a breaking point that enough is enough, and although you might see it as angry words spoken in the moment, a lot of time it is verbal abuse to make the other feel horrible about themselves. This can destroy a relationship bc people can only put up with so much. Your friend could be at that point, the point of not wanted to be involved in this type of connection. Sending message after message won't help, it will actually hurt your chances of fixing the relationship. Give him time to think about what is best for him, he might forgive you and try again, or he might not think you are worth the time. It really does depend on what type of relationship you have with this person. Best of luck, don't contact him again, if you don't hear from him you will have your answer.

Actually, this is the first time i’ve Ever said anything hurtful to this friend, and I honestly did not know it was hurtful in the first place until I asked my friends about if after it was said. Which was why I reacted so dramatically.

But yes, the first and only time I have ever said something hurtful.

you're chasing your tail on this one. you didn't mean to be hurtful. you've apologised. and now you think you've harassed this friend by being too apologetic. friendship is a two-way thing. if this friend really is a friend, when they said they'd accepted your apology they'd have meant it. possibly they're otherwise pre-occupied by something at the moment. who knows. but one thing is for certain: if this has blown out your friendship with this friend, it wasn't much of a friendship in the first place.